


Whatever You Say

by Soalovingmom



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-15
Updated: 2016-03-15
Packaged: 2018-05-26 23:52:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 16
Words: 33,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6260887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Soalovingmom/pseuds/Soalovingmom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Carol and Daryl never met up again when she saved them from Termius.  Now they meet years later, and things are different for both of them.  Will Daryl be able to pull her back and will a secret help bring them together or tear them apart.  Dark themes through out.  This one is dark and twisty if you have triggers for sexual abuse don't read this one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

-CD-  
Frozen in place behind dense pine trees she watched them. She watched her family, her group, the people she had come to love over the past few years. She felt joy in her heart as she watched Maggie and Glenn hold each other. Knowing the two were whispering things to each other, promises of their love. She felt her breath catch as Rick appeared in the little clearing that her family had found after they had escaped Terminus, because of her.

But it was Rick’s face that reminded her, she wasn’t welcome anymore with the people she loved. What she had done, what had happened made her a danger in Rick’s eyes. She wiped at her tears as she watched Rick hold his son. The boy just as much Carol’s now, as he was Rick and Lori’s. 

She started to take a step toward them, when she saw him.

Daryl.

Her breath caught in her throat as she watched him. He looked destroyed as he walked toward the group. She hid quickly behind a large pine, his crossbow loose at her side. Putting her hand over her mouth she tried to control her breathing. What would he think about her now? Things had changed between them. Things were different after that last night at the prison, the night before the sickness, before he left on the run to get medicine, before she did what she had to. Before she was banished left on the side of the road like trash.

She felt anger and hurt radiate through her body. If they only knew what she really did, but that was something she would take to her grave. 

She moved slowly, peeking around the tree to stare at him again. Her heart breaking as she thought of their night together, it had been everything she had ever dreamed of and more. But now she wondered if he would still want her like that, still love her after everything Rick had probably told him.

She shuddered as she thought of looking into his stormy blue eyes and seeing hate and disgust. She took a lot. She could take a hit, Ed had taught her that. She could take loss, Sophia had taught her that. She could be strong, Daryl had taught her that. But what she couldn’t take was having him hate her.

Looking back at him, she knew what she had to do. If she left now, if she ran she could take that last perfect night with her. Covering her mouth to keep in a sob, she shook as she gently set the cross bow next to her. Kneeling down she took off her disgusting walker covered poncho she had made and threw it. With tears running down her face she reached into her jacket pocket and pulled out a small note pad she had given to Mikka when she and Ty had first taken the girls to the grove. She pulled out the small pencil trying to block out the images of the two girls playing tic tac toe with her and Ty while she baked pecans. That was a pain for another day.

Shaking she wrote a quick note, telling herself over and over in her head that this was for the best. This was what was right. Taking a deep breath she stood up, shouldering the crossbow, praying to Sophia that she had the strength to walk away from everything she loved. To walk away from….HIM.

She kept low as she got closer to them. Thankful that Daryl had taught her how to walk silently through the woods. The memories of the two of them hunting making her almost stumble. She righted herself hiding behind a bush. Looking up she saw his eyes scanning the area, he always seemed to know when something was near, when she was near.

When Rick got his attention and he turned his head, she moved to a small area near them. Laying the weapons down, she made sure the note was attached to his crossbow. Her eyes took in his back, the dirty angel wing vest making her smile sadly as she moved away from them.

When she was far enough away, she took her rifle off her back and took a deep breath. She shot right in front of his crossbow, knowing it would get their attention. Then she put the rifle on her back and ran not looking back. She sobbed as she ran, thinking of Karen and David, thinking of Mikka, and Lizzie. All the blood she had on her hands. 

She stumbled down a bank and fought the need to scrub her hands clean in a small brook. She ran making her way to the rail road tracks.

She ran from her sins.

She ran from her family.

She ran from herself.

Most importantly she ran from him.

Because running hurt less than him hating her.

Closing her eyes as she came to a small road, she left the tracks hugging her middle she headed toward a new life. Hoping that one day, he would forgive her and understand.

She really would do anything for her family, anything for him.

-CD-

Daryl felt exhaustion in his body like he had never known. He knew how close to death they had came. When they had lined them up getting ready to slit their throats he had closed his eyes and focused on her face. Thinking of that one night, the night he finally said fuck it and went to her. The night he knew he couldn’t fight how he felt anymore. That night he had became hers and she became his.

-CD- (flashback)  
Daryl had finished up talking to Beth, telling her about Zach. His mind had been mess since they lost the kid earlier in the day. He liked the kid and knew how good he was for Beth and he felt like he had failed to keep Zach safe. Another kid he hadn’t brought home.

He was heading toward his cell, when Michonne stepped out of her own cell. His friend knew his heart, she had been pushing him for weeks to finally come clean with Carol about how he felt, but being the pussy he was he hadn’t gotten up the nerve to tell her yet.

Michonne cleared her throat, making his head jerk up and he narrowed his eyes at her. The ebony warrior sighed, her voice a whisper, “Don’t have regret. We never know when it will be our last run. Don’t die knowing she didn’t know.”

As quick as she had appeared she disappeared back into her cell. Daryl looked up toward the cell that he shared with Carol and he knew in that moment he couldn’t NOT tell her. He couldn’t live another day not letting her know how he felt.

Climbing the stairs, he walked with purpose as he pushed the makeshift curtain out of the way and stepped into the cell. Carol was laying on her bunk, her arm absently above her head and a book in her hand. She smiled sadly at him, laying the book on her chest. Daryl licked his lips taking her in as the candle light made her look like some type of Greek goddess. “Did you talk to Beth?”

Daryl nodded, his heart hammering in his chest. He kicked off his boots, his hands fumbling as he started to undo the buttons of his sleeveless shirt.

Carol sat up, her face showing her confusion, “Daryl…what…?”

Daryl shook his head, “Nah, I think ya done enough talkin’. I want ya to listen for once.”

Carol nodded, her eyes wide as he took off his shirt flinging it to the ground, he walked over to stand in-between her legs, he swallowed hard, “I ain’t much Carol. Never been…not till ya took the time….not till ya believed in me….show me….I ain’t gonna be like those kids…ain’t gonna regret not….”

He dropped to his knees, his strong arms going on either side of her hips in fists. He looked through his bangs, staring into her eyes, his voice cracking, “I’m yours.”

He saw her ocean blue eyes start to pool as a watery smile filled her face, she brought her hands to his cheeks, “Silly man, I’ve always been yours.”

With a nod he leaned in, his chapped lips brushing her soft ones. The first kiss was gentle, it was slow. He pulled away for a second, checking to see if her face held disgust, but he only saw love. He licked his lips and leaned in his lips touching hers, caressing hers. Soft against rough.

He flicked his tongue out, testing the waters, groaning at the taste of her as she opened her mouth for him. He felt her laying back, taking him with her, he moved with her. Positioning them onto the prison cot, he hovered over her, “Your mine.”  
Carol nodded, her hand running down his strong chest, resting right above his heart where his grandfather’s name was, “I’m yours.”

Daryl ducked his head, his tongue snaking into her mouth the two of them moaned as they tasted each other as deep as they could. His hand slowly moving to the hem of her tank top. He heard her whimper as his hand brushed her bare breast, his finger softly kneading the flesh, his fingers flicking across the hardened nipple making her arch her back.  
Kissing down her long graceful neck, he pushed the tank top up. He had to taste her nipples, had to suck them. When his lips wrapped around the dusty rose peak, she moaned, her hands fisting in his hair she tugged at it making him growl.  
His hard cock pulsing as he grinded against her. He released her nipple with a pop and gave the other the same treatment as his fingers started working on button of her jeans, he didn’t want anything between the two of them.  
Moving down her body, pulling her jeans and panties together he saw a flash of fear skitter across her face. He shook his head, whispering, “Your mine.”

He felt her shudder as he stood losing his own pants; he pulled her to the edge of the bed falling to his knees. He looked up at her, his voice heavy with want, “Tell me.”

Carol nodded, biting her lip, “I’m yours. Your mine.”

Daryl kissed her knee, watching her face as he moved down to her wet throbbing core. He ran his tongue along the damp curls and felt her whole body shiver as she held in a moan. Taking his thumb he pulled her open more, her legs going over his shoulders. He had never gone down on a woman, but this was his woman and he wanted to know every part of her. His thumb rubbed slow circles on her hot needy clit and he groaned as his cock dipped with pre cum. Looking her in the eye he lowered his mouth to her pussy and sucked the hardened nub. She tasted like heaven as he sucked, his middle finger sliding into her wet folds, fucking her with his finger he watched as she turned her head biting into her pillow to control the scream that threatened to come. He increased his speed, until he felt her wetness pour against his scruff. Carol was breathing heavy and she turned her head a sated look on her face.

Pulling him toward her she licked her essence off his scruff as her small delicate hand wrapped around his hard silken cock. She lined him up and they both groaned as he filled her in one thrust.

He kissed her slow trying to hold off from cumming, she was tight and fight him like a glove as he slowly began moving. He pulled away from her a little his hands holding her head, his fingers playing with her silver hair, “Your mine, I want you to see me.”

Carol nodded, moaning quietly, “I’m yours Daryl. Only yours.”

He had been shocked even at himself as he moved slowly, his cock filling her more with each thrust. He made love to her, like she deserved. He felt her start to tense around him. Snaking his hand between them, he found her clit, rubbing it in those slow circles he felt her silken walls slam down around him. He buried his head in the crook of her neck, cumming harder than he had in his life.

When he came down from his high, his head was on her chest and she was lazily playing with his long hair. Looking up at her slowly, he swallowed, she looked so fucking happy, she smiled, “Took you long enough Dixon.”

-CD-

That’s what he thought about as he waited for those sick fucks to kill him and then cut him into next week’s dinner. He thought of that night. He knew he would leave the group. He would find her; she couldn’t have gotten that far. He stopped watching as the group rested from their escape. Everyone paired off with their loved ones. But his loved one was gone, sent away.  
Rick approached him, the ex-sheriff had Carl tucked under his arm, “We need to go back and get the guns. Not safe out here without them.”

Daryl didn’t say anything, he just nodded. Knowing in his heart he would get the group somewhere safe and then he would leave. He would go in search of her. He heard something in the woods behind him and he turned quickly, squinting he scanned the dense pine trees. Waiting for one of the Terminus people or a walker to stumble out. When he saw nothing he turned back to the others, listening as Rick rattled off the plan of attack.

He hated Rick. He knew that now. Rick had taken the one thing he loved away from him. Rick had Carl, Rick always had someone. Hell, he had Lori; Rick had been loved by a woman. He had children, but Daryl had only ever had Merle and that wasn’t much. He loved his brother, but Merle was an asshole. It took the world ending and a little girl getting lost for Daryl to find love and Rick had taken it away from him. He was getting ready to just walk the fuck away when shots rang out.  
The group hit the ground, Daryl and Rick jumped to their feet scanning the area. That’s when Daryl saw the crossbow, Michonne’s katana, and some guns on the ground. Moving cautiously he moved toward the weapons seeing a white piece of paper waving in the wind. 

He bent down opening the paper, scribbled in familiar handwriting, Ty has Judith one mile west in a small cabin. I’m glad you’re all safe. Stay safe.

Daryl felt Rick behind him and he shoved the note in the man’s hands. His eyes darting around for her. He started scanning the ground and found her tracks. His heart beating out of his chest as he started to track her, almost running as he did. He saw the casing from her shot, on the ground. He smiled, she always did forget to police her shells. He stood up barely hearing Rick behind him, “DARYL!”

Daryl snarled as a hand gripped his shoulder, spinning he came face to face with Michonne, “I gotta go.”  
Michonne nodded, “We need you first. We need you to help us get to Judith. Once we get Ty and Judith we’ll go after her, no matter what.”

Daryl felt tears biting at his eyes as he scanned the woods in the direction her tracks went. He knew that the group would never find Judith if he didn’t go with them. He knew the little girl needed her father and brother no matter how he felt about Rick. He nodded his head, whispering, “No matter what.”


	2. Sophia's Hallow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Old friends reconnect.....

-CD-

Rick felt like his boots weighed a hundred pounds as he followed the large bald headed man that had introduced himself as Dave Black. They had come across a man on the road who had told them of this place. That this was a safe place for the kids, that they could find a place to finally stop and take count of all the losses. 

Five years since Terminus and they had gone from one bad situation to another. They had gone as far as Virginia until they had ran into a mad man that even he couldn’t beat. Negan had chased them out of the state and now they found themselves in the mountains of Kentucky. Somewhere in Pike County, is what Daryl had said.

So finding the man on the road, Kip, who had told them about this place, had been a blessing, if there were even such things anymore. They had children to care for and people that were sick, hurt, that needed a place to mend.

So when they arrived at the large wooden gate built out of what looked like old telephone poles, they had been granted entrance, on one condition, Rick had to talk to their leader. Their leader would make the final call as to if they would be allowed to join them. Dave had cautioned them, if she said yes, it just meant that they could stay for now. The whole community had to decide if they would stay.

So Rick walked behind Dave to what looked like a small cabin of sorts right inside the gate. The others were left sitting against the wall, under guard until they got back. 

Dave opened the door and ushered him inside. The room was simple; there were a few papers on a bulletin board near the door, another door at the other side of the room, and two chairs in the center of the room. Rick shook his head trying to erase the memory of meeting the governor in a similar fashion all those years ago.

Dave motioned to the chair nearest the door they came in, “She’ll be right here.”

Rick looked up at the olive skinned man, “My people…”

Dave gave him an easy smile, “My wife and some of the guys are getting them food. I sent my son to get the doc to have a look at the bow man that was bleeding everywhere. If she says no, we’ll at least give you food and let you sleep inside the wall for the night. We’re not assholes.” Dave sighed, his face getting grim, “When she gets here….just answer her questions….we let you in….by her say. Whatever she says, it goes here.”

Rick sighed, scrubbing a tired hand across his face. He looked up as the door on the opposite side of the room opened and Rick felt his world spin. He stood up, his eyes starting to water, “Carol.” His voice almost so low he almost didn’t think he said it.  
He took her in, her hair was a little longer, but she looked good, her hips were fuller. But when her eyes met his, he knew something horrible had happened to her. On her forehead was a familiar ‘W’ that he remembered from his encounter with the wolves. And her eyes, there was no spark left there, they were almost dead, like doll eyes.

“Carol.”

“Rick.”

-CD-

Carol knew they were there, Mitchell, Dave’s son had come to her first. Telling her that a man claiming to be an ex-sheriff and a man with a dirty angel wing vest were at the gate with several people, women and kids included. She had quietly told him that she would be there soon. 

Once the boy had ran away to get the doctor she steeled herself. She had dreamed of finding them again, once upon a time that thought had kept her going. The thought that HE would find her, rescue her from this hell on Earth. But he had never come and now her thoughts of him, her real thoughts of him were left to small glances of him in dreams, where they had never been apart. Where she had never been….

Shaking her head she pulled her jacket close to her as she headed for the small welcome cabin. Taking a deep breath she opened the door and looked into the eyes of the man she blamed for every second of hell she had been through since she left that clearing outside of Terminus.

The tired blue eyes of Rick Grimes.

“Carol.”

“Rick.”

“Carol.”

She walked over and sat down motioning to the chair that Rick was now standing in front of. Dave gave her a sad smile as he gently pushed Rick back into a sitting position.

“Car…”

“Why are you here?”

“Caro…”

“Rick, why are you here?”

“We….we need somewhere safe….the kids….we all do….we heard of this place….someone we met on the road said it was safe…”

“Who said it was safe?”

“Carol….”

“RICK, who said it, was safe?”

“A man, Kip I think his name was. Gave us food, saw Judith and the baby, my baby, Aaron, saw little Hershel. Michonne just…”

“Rick….are you here to upset what I have here?”

“NO! We didn’t even know this was your…..we have been out there for a long time Carol. We looked for you….”

“Rick, you’re not in charge here. YOU ARE NO ONE HERE. If I let them open those doors…you and….your people will pull your weight….”

“Of course Carol, but you have to hear me out….”

“I built this place and if you think for one minute…”

“Carol, we don’t want this place, I want you to listen to me, we …..I…..I’m sorry!”

Getting up from the chair and walking toward the door that she had come through she looked over her shoulder at Dave, “Let them in.” Her eyes cut to an astonished Rick, “But keep that motherfucker away from me or I’ll kill him.”

Dave nodded his hand still holding Rick in place as the woman that looked like Carol but wasn’t the Carol Rick known that was getting ready to open the door to leave him, she turned around with a hard look on her face, “Welcome to Sophia’s Hallow, Officer Friendly.”

-CD-

The door shutting was like a shotgun blast and Rick stood there with his mouth open. Dave felt for the man he really did. Dave Black and his family had found Carol by chance. The strong woman had brought his wife and daughter back to him when those little fuckers the wolves had taken them away from his group. They had been planning a rescue when Carol came walking into their camp with his wife Kayla by her side. From that moment Dave had been indebted to the small silver haired woman. He had helped her through the hardest hours of her life and together his wife, he, and Carol had built Sophia’s Hallow into the sanctuary it was now.

Dave had heard stories from his wife about the man in the dirty angel wing vest and the fucker sheriff that had ruined Carol’s life. So when they showed up at the gate today he knew she needed to be the one to let them inside. The one to give them the chance, it wasn’t his place.

Dave gave Rick a nod, “Come on, we have housing for your group. And you look like you might need something to eat.”

Rick didn’t say anything his eyes still fixed on the door where Carol had left. He nodded his head and fell behind Dave heading back toward the others. His mind racing as he tried to think what he would say to Daryl.

-CD-

Rick walked up to his group, muttering to Dave he would need a minute to talk to them before they took them to housing. Dave had nodded hanging back with some of his other men at the gate. Rick was greeted by his daughter, Judith, who at six years old slammed into his legs hugging him hard. She looked up giving him a toothy grin, “Daddy, they gave us some oatmeal, it’s so good and warm, it even has honey in it.”

Rick ran his hand over his daughter’s head and smiled, “That’s great sweetheart.”

His eyes looking up to catch Michonne’s who was feeding their two month son a bottle, Michonne smiled, “They were great. The doctor took Daryl inside already to stitch up his arm.”

Rick sighed, looking around at his group. Glenn was holding Hershel, while Maggie ate. Tara was sitting close to Eugene her head resting on his shoulder. Abraham was standing guard with Carl keeping an eye out for walkers. Aaron and Eric were eating quietly close together. Rick knew he had to tell them before he let them walk into the compound, he only wished he had been able to tell Daryl first. He took a deep breath, “Carol’s here.”

Glenn and Maggie were on their feet; Glenn’s face almost beaming, “She’s here?”

The group from the prison began to talk all at once and Rick chuckled holding up his hands, “Settle down, settle down. She’s in charge here. Seems she did alright when she…..well she’s done ok here I think. We talked, but she’s not real happy to see me as you can all guess. But she’s agreed to let us stay, for now. Dave told me there has to be a community vote, but she has the say on who gets to do the trial period.”

Michonne walked over, their son Aaron tight against her chest, and gave his arm a soft squeeze of support. He nodded his head, he had no words. Exhaustion and grief pouring off him. A woman he didn’t give a chance, a woman he had thrown away, was giving his family a safe place to stay.

Dave walked over to them, his arm wrapped around a dark haired woman with a gentle smile, the woman smiled at them, “Let’s get you all settled, I’m Kayla Black, Dave’s wife.”

The group gathered their meager belongings and fell in step behind her. When the guards opened the gate the group stared at the small community. Neat rows of trailers with gravel pathways in-between. What looked like a large garden was in the middle, some snow peas still coming out of the ground. The back of the compound butted right up against the rocky side of a mountain. The compound was abuzz with activity the people who lived there were stopping to stare at the newcomers.

Dave pointed to a large mobile near the garden, “That’s our place and the headquarters of this place if you need anything, just knock. Someone is always there.”

Glenn moved forward toward Kayla, “Can we see Carol?”

Rick noticed Kayla’s face turned down for just a second, then she put her gentle smile back in place, “Carol will see all of you at dinner. She has some pressing matters that came up. But she wanted me to get you all settled.”

Dave nodded down a row of trailers and the group fell in behind him. Stopping at a larger one, he opened the door and waited as the group got inside. He came in behind them and shut the door looking around at the rag tag group as they tried to fit in the modest living room. “House is yours.”

Aaron had his arm draped around Eric, “Where did these come from?”

Dave chuckled, “Well this place was a mobile home lot. When we were looking for a place we just decided with it up against those rocky cliffs of the mountain, it was the best place to build. Me and the guys in my group all worked construction in Ohio. So we got some big machines and just started moving shit. We have runs every week, bringing in what the group needs.”

Kayla smiled, looking at Michonne and Maggie, gesturing toward the kids, “My daughter will be by with supplies for the kids, but everything else is stocked. There is a small trailer at the end of this row that has clothes so please go there get what you need. We have all sizes! Also pick up some extra blankets.”

Dave walked toward the kitchen area, “Once you feel at ease we can break you up more, give you more housing. We figured, well….that you might want to stay together.”

Rick stepped toward the man, “What about our weapons?”

Dave sighed, “Carol said you could keep them.”

Maggie smiled, “Is she coming to see us?”

Kayla smiled at the woman, running a finger along one of baby Hershel’s chubby cheeks, “She said she’d see you at dinner, she’s very busy.”

Michonne nodded, “And in shock to see us.”

Kayla turned toward the woman and nodded, “Something like that…..Anyway Dave has a few things to show you and I must go. But dinner is at sundown, it’s the large building that looks like a garage at the back of the compound, just follow the smell of food.”

Dave gave Kayla a kiss and the woman left. Dave motioned toward the floor of the kitchen, “If we have an attack, walker or human, every house has a bunker underneath.” He pulled up a large rug in the middle of the kitchen floor to reveal a trap door. Using the latch he pulled it up to reveal a ladder.

Rick and Glenn looked down inside both nodding their heads. Rick looked at Dave, “Were these here too?”

Dave chuckled, “Fuck no, we dug big ass holes and put tractor trailer containers in them, cut the hole on the top, filled in the holes, and then set the houses on top of them. There are blankets, weapons, water, and some food in each one. We’ve had trouble before and we don’t plan on anyone taking this place from us.”

Rick nodded, understanding that he had made the same mistakes at the prison and then at Alexandria, not having a backup plan. Dave closed the trap door and put the rug back, clapping his large ringed hands together, “Well if you need anything let me know. I have to get back to the gate.”

After Dave had left the group stood around staring at each other, Rick looked up at his group and sighed, “Welcome to Sophia’s Hallow.”

-CD-

Carol hugged herself as she watched Kayla Black from the window of the home she shared with the Black family. She wasn’t going to cry, it just wasn’t in her anymore. She was who she was. She was stronger than she ever thought she could be. She had love in her life and love in heart, granted it was only for a few people. She had put up large walls around her heart; it was the only way for her to survive. 

She turned as Kayla came into the house, closing the door behind her. Kayla sighed, leaning heavy against the door, her eyes going to her dear friend, “They’re settled for now. Doc Bentley is seeing to….well she’s taking care of him.”

Carol sighed, sitting down in the worn rocker that was almost like a security blanket to her, she leaned up on her knees and folded her hands in front of her, and “I don’t know what to do. I should’ve sent them away.”

Kayla took to her knees, kneeling in front of her friend, she put her hand on Carol’s cheek, making her look her in the eyes, “It’s not who we are. We don’t send women and children out there. You had to bring them in. He deserves to….well you need to do what you feel is right. But Dave and I are behind you.”

Carol nodded, taking her friend’s hands and closing her eyes, “I know.”

The sound of little feet in the hallway had the two women turning. A five year old girl with long strawberry blonde curly hair stopped short, her face the perfect fusion of her father and mother, “I’m sorry momma, no running in the house. But we gots to go! I’m baking brownies with Rocco today.”

Carol smiled as she stood up, she felt Kayla put a hand on her back, looking at her daughter she nodded, “Alright Atlanta, let’s go to the mess hall and do some cooking baby.”

The little one let out a squeal of happiness and grabbed her mother’s hand leading her out the door and across the compound toward the mess hall. Neither of them seeing the man that had just came from the doctor’s house. The man with the dirty angel winged vest. The man of Carol’s dreams and best memories, the man that at that moment couldn’t believe his eyes.  
I’m evil…yes I am….review me!


	3. I'm Gonna Love You Through It

When you’re weak, I’ll be strong,  
When you let go, I’ll hold on,  
When you need to cry,  
I swear that I’ll be there to dry your eyes,  
When you feel lost and scared to death,  
Like you can’t take one more step,  
Just take my hand, together we can do it,  
I’m gonna love you through it!  
-Martina McBride

-D-

Daryl was frozen to the spot, his eyes tearing up as he watched HER, the woman he had been chasing for almost six years, his woman. He watched as she smiled down at the little girl that was walking with her, his heart beating out of his chest. All this time and she was here, she was safe.

He felt someone next to him and he looked over quickly seeing Doctor Bentley, the woman smiled at him, “Everything alright Mr. Dixon?”

Daryl motioned toward Carol and the little girl, his voice cracking with emotion, “Who’s that woman? With the girl?”

Doctor Bentley’s smile widened, “Oh that’s Carol, Carol Dixon. She’s in charge around here. She and Dave’s family started Sophia’s Hallow.”

Daryl’s eyes cut to the doctor, “Dixon?” 

Doctor Bentley’s eyes went wide, “Do you know her?”

Daryl nodded, his feet already heading in the direction that he had seen Carol go, “Yeah, she’s MINE.”

-D-

Carol laughed as her and Atlanta walked into the mess hall. Her daughter was trying to convince her that if she made brownies with her uncle Rocco that Atlanta had to try them out before dinner to make sure they were good enough for the others. 

Atlanta looked up at her mother, her face taking on a familiar scowl, “Momma, ya know I’m just thinking of the others. They’re our family.”

Carol chuckled, kneeling down she ran a finger along her daughter’s cheek, “Well fine, I guess.”

Atlanta’s face spilt into a smile that would knock anyone out, she threw her arms around her mother’s neck, “THANK YOU THANK YOU MOMMA!”

Carol hugged her girl to her, closing her eyes, enjoying these few moments before she knew she would have to share her daughter with someone else. Her biggest fear was losing her, if she lost Atlanta she knew she couldn’t go on, Atlanta was her lifeline in this world. And her biggest fear about Rick and Daryl being there was they would take the girl from her, thinking her a danger. Carol knew she was dangerous, she knew things that had happened since she left the prison had damaged her, but she would never hurt her little girl.

A loud laugh from the door way of the kitchen made them both look over at the large man leaning there. Rocco Vita, was one of Dave’s guys, in his sixty Rocco had at one time been a bulldozer operator. Now he spent most of his time in the kitchen, “Well what is going on in here?”

Atlanta smirked, her arms loosely around her mother’s neck, “She said we should try them out after we make them!”

Carol chuckled, looking from her daughter to Rocco, “I said you COULD, you asked.”

Carol stood up, her hand playfully patting her daughter’s butt as she ran into Rocco’s arms, the big man picking her up and kissing her chubby little cherub face, he looked at Carol, “Ok momma, I’ll keep her here till dinner when you come.”

Carol nodded watching as the two disappeared into the kitchen. She hugged herself, no matter what they had been through she had done for Atlanta what she didn’t for Sophia; she had kept her safe, making her strong. Carol closed her eyes, going to turn she jumped when the doors to the mess hall were opened hard. Standing there with the afternoon sun as a back drop in all his dirty redneck glory was Daryl Dixon; he looked like an angel the way the light was coming around his body.

Her eyes went to his face, taking in the new lines and the new gray that dotted his scruff and long hair. His chest was heaving and as she looked into those beautiful blue eyes she saw tears, his voice broke, “I found ya woman.”

Before she knew what was happening he was picking her up in a bone crushing hug, muttering into her shoulder. “I looked for ya….I was comin’…..God woman…..I’m here woman….”

Carol was frozen, panic was filling her, no one touched her but Kayla and Atlanta. Now Daryl had her in his arms, she could feel his lips starting to kiss down her neck and she let out a little half scream as she shoved him away with everything she had. She shook her head at him, “I have to go….Can’t….have to go…”

Carol headed for the door, she had to escape, she couldn’t do this here, she couldn’t do this with Atlanta so close. She couldn’t let him see what she was now, what was left of her. Putting her hand on her knuckle buster knife and sprinted from the mess hall, hoping like hell he’d let her go.

Daryl watched her face, the ‘w’ screaming at him the damage that his woman had probably been through. He tried to process it, but the shock of finally finding her was making it hard to take in everything that happened. When she all but ran from the mess hall, he growled, he hadn’t looked for her this long to have her take off on him now. So he turned running after her, he wasn’t letting her go now, she was his.

-D-

Carol kept her head down as she ran toward the house, she knew it was safe in the house, Dave was there. Dave and Kip had protected her, sometimes even from herself. She sped up when she saw the porch. Then she felt his hand on her wrist, his voice right behind her. It was too familiar something that she dreamt of, she wouldn’t let anyone hurt her again, she couldn’t she had Atlanta. Sobbing she pulled her knife and turned on him, doing the only thing she could, protecting herself. Her mind a jumble mess of those weeks of hell, the faces flipping through her mind as she lunged at him with the knife, thinking he was one of them.

Daryl couldn’t believe her face when she turned around, the fear was clear. The knife in her hand gleamed in the sunlight and he held up his hands, “Whoa now Carol, it’s me.”

When she lunged at him with the knife he knew it was coming and he side stepped her, grabbing her arm, he flipped her back to his front. His mouth at her ear, “Ssssh….I got ya woman….ain’t gonna hurt ya….drop the knife baby.”

Daryl saw Dave coming toward him, his wife running up behind him. Dave shook his head at Daryl, then his eyes went to Carol, his voice low, “Carol, everything is fine. Atlanta is fine, you’re fine, it’s just Daryl and he didn’t know not to touch you. I saw him; he was just trying to get your attention girl.”

Daryl nodded, he barely registered that Glenn and Rick were standing close by having been drawn by all the noise. He held onto her tight as Dave moved toward the knife, his mouth still low by her ear, “He’s just taking the knife baby, let him have it.”

Carol didn’t know what to do, she felt like the world was closing in on her, she knew somewhere deep in her mind she was having a panic attack, but she couldn’t stop it. It was like she was on the outside of her body screaming at herself to stop, but she couldn’t. She only knew she had to get away from them, get away from HIM. 

Stepping back she slammed the heel of her boot down on his foot. But Daryl held tight as Dave pried her hand from her knife, handing it to Kayla behind him. Dave didn’t let his eyes leave Carol’s, “We need to get to the house, don’t you want to go to the house.”

Carol nodded her head, wanting to get away from HIM, wanting to get away from the eyes of the community on her. As she looked away she saw Rick’s face in the crowd, then fear ripped through her, she started shaking her head, “no, no, NO, NO! You can’t have her!”

Dave nodded at Daryl, “Let her go, I got her.”

Daryl slowly let the woman in his arms go, she won’t go near Dave she stood away from both of them, her eyes going from Dave and Kayla to Rick and Daryl, she whispered looking at the ground hugging herself, “Please go get her, please bring her home.”

Dave nodded, “We will, let’s get you settled down first sweetheart.”

Just then all their world’s changed as they heard little Atlanta, “MOMMA!”

Daryl turned to see the little girl running fast toward her mother with the biggest smile on her face. He turned and looked at Carol, the scared look in her eye, she was fucking terrified and Daryl knew why. He turned back to the little girl with the strawberry blonde curls. As the little girl went to run pass him, he scooped her up.

Carol lunged at him, but Dave caught her, whispering in her ear, “She’s fine, Carol, she’s fine.”

Atlanta smiled at the dirty man, being brought up in the community she wasn’t afraid of anyone that got pass the gate, “Hello.”

Daryl’s voice cracked, his eyes filling with tears, “Who’re ya darlin’?”

Atlanta giggled, “Silly, I’m Atlanta, Atlanta May Dixon. Who the hell are you?”

Carol shook her head, whispering, “Please don’t take her, please.”

Daryl looked at Dave, his eyes cutting to Carol who was quickly dissolving into tears. Dave held Carol in a tight hug and gave Daryl a curt nod, granting him permission to talk to the girl.

Daryl swallowed hard looking back at the little girl in his arms, her face so much like his and her momma’s, “Do ya know who I am?”

Atlanta looked at him, deep in thought, “A part of my family, momma says everyone here is part of my family.”

Daryl choked back a sob, kissing the little girl on the head, “Yeah baby, I’m part of your family.”

Atlanta looked over at Carol, who was still sobbing quietly, “Please don’t…please.”

Atlanta turned her eyes back to Daryl, “Why’s my momma sad? Did someone hurt her?” He felt her little hand go for a small knife that was her tiny belt.

Daryl smiled a watery smile at her, “No sweetheart, ya momma just got scared, why don’t ya go give her a hug, make it better.”

Feeling sick, he set Atlanta on the ground, watching as the little girl walked over to her mother. Carol fell to her knees, grabbing up her daughter. Atlanta stroked her mother’s hair, “It’s alright momma, just a bad dream during the day. I love you momma.”

Carol sobbed harder, Daryl was sick, what had happened to the woman that took out Terminus? The woman who as Ty had told it, had protected Judith from Lizzie? The woman who had survived losing her first born. 

He fell to his knees, his voice breaking, as Carol looked at him, “I ain’t takin’ her…..but I ain’t goin’ anywhere….I ain’t takin’ her.”

Carol buried her head into her daughter’s hair, finally letting Dave help her up, while Kayla with tears rolling down her face took Atlanta. As Dave started guiding Carol toward the house he yelled over his shoulder, “I’ll be right back bowman, don’t fucking move.”

Daryl wasn’t moving, he was still kneeling on the ground. His mind a mess as he fell forward his fists connecting hard with the ground, fighting to keep from throwing up. His mind racing, Carol had been banished, she had been alone, and pregnant with his baby, his baby girl. He felt Glenn kneel next to him, his friend putting a hand on his back, “It’s gonna be fine Daryl, just breathe.”

Then he saw familiar cowboy boots.

Daryl looked up very slowly, his eyes taking in every inch of Rick. The Rick he had stayed with to help protect HIS KIDS, but what about Daryl’s kid. He had followed the motherfucker around almost dying several times to protect what RICK had wanted, all the while his LIFE, what mattered to him was out there alone.

Daryl growled, sounding more animal than human and then he launched himself at Rick. The only thought he has was Rick Grimes had to die.

-D-

Rick had been heartbroken as he watched Carol crumble. He couldn’t believe that Daryl was holding a little girl that looked a hell of a lot like him. Rick started to put the pieces together and he knew in that moment he was guilty of so much more than just banishing Carol, he had given her a death sentence, a slow one at that. If Carol hadn’t found the group she was with now Rick knew she probably wouldn’t have survived and for sure her daughter wouldn’t have.

When they took Carol inside he approached Daryl, knowing his friend needed his support. But when Daryl looked up at him, he knew he was in a world of trouble.

Daryl’s fist connected hard with Rick’s chin and his head snapped back knocking him to the ground. Before Rick could even fight back Daryl was on him, his fist punishing the man for the almost six years he had taken from him. Daryl was screaming at him, “I LOVED HER! YOU KNEW THAT! YOU SHOULD’VE WAITED FOR ME! THAT WASN’T HER!”

Rick Grimes knew in that moment he very well might just die at the hands of his best friend.  
He knew he deserved it.

-D-

Dave had gotten Carol settled in the worn rocking chair when he heard all hell breaking loose in his front yard. He looked over at his teenage son Mitch, “GET THE DOC.”

He darted out the door to see Daryl beating the piss out of the man that Carol referred to as Officer Friendly. He saw the poor Asian kid get pushed away when he tried to get Daryl off the other man. Taking his time Dave walked out and shoved his arms under Daryl’s locking them behind Daryl’s head he hauled him off Rick. Growling in the man’s ear, “CALM YOUR SHIT….YOUR KID IS INSIDE AND YOUR WOMAN!”

His words seemed to snapped Daryl out of the animal like state he had been in and Daryl nodded his head. Dave motioned to Glenn, “Take him to the doc’s house, four one down this row.”

Glenn didn’t know what the hell to do, so he nodded and grabbed up an almost unconscious Rick and helped the man toward the doctor’s house.

Dave sighed, “Can I let ya go now?”

Daryl nodded and Dave released him. Daryl’s knuckles were bleeding and Dave could still hear small sobs erupting from the other man’s chest. He took a deep breath running his hands over his bald head and pulled a cigarette from his pocket, lighting it he handed one and the lighter to Daryl. Daryl’s hand shook as he lit the cigarette, once Dave saw he was calming down he sighed, giving him a pat on the back, “Come on I need a fucking drink.”

Daryl didn’t say anything he just fell in behind the other man. They headed back toward the mess hall and Daryl followed him into the kitchen. Dave walked over and growled at Rocco, “Why the fuck didn’t you keep Atlanta here?”

Rocco looked over at Daryl and sighed, “I didn’t know the fucking Jerry Springer show was in town ok! She got her first blister from a burn, from cooking, I told her that made her a big girl. She wanted to show her fucking mom.”

Dave walked back toward the pantry grabbing a first aid kit and a bottle of whiskey; he motioned to Daryl to sit down at a small table in the back of the kitchen. Dave sat down opening the whiskey he took a long pull then handed it to Daryl; he looked over at Rocco, “Well next fuckin’ time keep her ass here!”

Rocco grumbled at him, but continued to stir a large pot of water. Dave set to work cleaning up Daryl’s knuckles. Daryl didn’t know what to think of the man, his eyes narrowed as he watched him.

Dave looked up at him and sighed, his fingers carefully cleaning Daryl’s knuckles, “She saved my wife and daughter.”

Daryl squinted at him, “Carol?”

Dave nodded, “Yeah, Carol. We were from Ohio, Cleveland area. When the dead started walking around, we started going south. Picking up people along the way, you know. So we were camped just over the border of Kentucky. We were on a run, a few guys left back at the camp. When we got there, the men were dead and the women were gone. My boy and one of his best friends had hidden; they told us what happen that these sick fuckers came into the camp. Well we tracked them, find their camp and were getting ready to attack that night when I hear this noise in trees. I turn around and there’s my wife and daughter, with a few of the other women, and Carol.”

Daryl swallowed hard, taking another pull from the whiskey bottle, “The wolves, we ran into them in Virginia.” Daryl looked down for a second, he knew the answer but he didn’t want to hear it, but he knew he had too, “They had Carol.”

Dave nodded, taking the whiskey bottle, his own eyes watering. “They had her for weeks. My wife said she was following a group she had left when the wolves found her, liked that she could take a lot of pain.” 

Daryl felt sick as he watched Dave’s face change, a murderous look crept across his features, he looked Daryl straight in the eye, “They wanted her because she was pregnant, they wanted to use her until the baby was almost born and then they were going to kill Carol and watch the baby eat it’s way out of her. My wife, my Kayla said they taunted Carol with that all the time. But somehow that woman got free and she killed ten men that night getting my wife and daughter and some of the others out of there. When I saw her….I couldn’t turn her away. We held up in an old farm house for a few weeks while the women recovered, Carol got better, she hadn’t spoken in weeks to anyone, not since the night she rescued them. She just sat in the rocking chair and hummed to herself. Doc says she has PTSD. She hasn’t had an episode in a long time.”

Daryl took another pull from the whiskey bottle, his eyes finally allowing silent tears to drop down his face, his voice low, “I didn’t know.”

Dave nodded, “I saw your face when you looked at Atlanta. I know. She didn’t know, when she left, she didn’t know.”

Daryl stared at the label on the whiskey bottle; he slowly looked up at Dave, “I want to be here.”

Dave smiled, “I figured, I might be able to help. Let’s take some food to my place. I’ll let you speak to her and tomorrow we’re start seeing what we can do about getting your family whole.”

Daryl gave Dave a small half smile, his mind going over the day. He thought he was looking for a safe place to lay his head, he found that. He thought he was looking for Carol, he found her. What he didn’t know he wanted, was a family, but come to find out it was something he had wanted all along.

-D-

Carol had settled down the sedative that doctor Bentley gave her had helped. She was still a mess, but she was grateful to our family, Dave, Kayla and the kids. Ella, their sixteen year old daughter was right now playing with Atlanta in her bedroom while Kayla made sure that Carol relaxed. 

She sat there, her feet slowly rocking the chair, wishing she knew how to fix everything. She knew he would hate her, she had his child and he never knew. HE would hate what was left her, her body more a patch work of scars then his was now, nothing anyone should see.

She heard the door to her and Atlanta’s room open and she gripped the rocking chair arms hard as Daryl stepped inside the room. She couldn’t look at him, she didn’t want to that hate.

Daryl had been coached for the last hour by Dave and Kayla on what he should say to her. He knew what he would say to her, he didn’t need to be told, he had known the moment he saw that ‘w’ on her forehead.

He chewed his lip, his eyes downcast, but looking at her indirectly. He moved slowly and he knelt down in front of her, his hand shaking as he brought it to her chin, making her look up. Carol whimpered and he smiled at her, “Hey, hey it’s fine; everything is fine Carol Ann, look in my eyes woman.”

Carol looked into his eyes and she show a lot of emotions there, but she didn’t see hate. She let go of the rocker and slowly gripped his wrist making him smile at her more, his voice soft, “Remember when I got back…from findin’ Merle…I was a fuckin’ mess. Ya won’t leave me be….ya came to me up in the tower and knelt down in front me like this….ya told me that no matter what you’d love me through it….ya sang that damn song to me while I cried like a bitch in your arms.” 

Daryl chuckled, leaning in a little bit toward her, “I ain’t gonna sing to ya, but Carol I ain’t lettin’ a fuckin’ thing touch ya or my kid. I love ya woman and ya know that, I’m gonna love that little girl too.”

Daryl took a deep breath, his voice shaking as he said to the words to the song that she had sang to him so long ago, “I know that you’re afraid and I am too, but you’ll never be alone I promise you, When you’re weak, I’ll be strong, when you let go, I’ll hold on, when you need to cry I swear that I’ll be there to dry your eyes, when you feel lost and scared to death, like you can’t take one more step, just take my hand, together we can do it, I’m gonna love ya through it…..I mean it Carol.”

She looked up at him and nodded her head, a sob escaping her throat when his hand brushed the ‘w’ on her forehead, “Ain’t nothin’ but a thing woman.”

He got up slowly, “I’m gonna go, need to eat and get some sleep. Ain’t gonna be bunkin’ with Rick, be with your friend Rocco. Come the mornin’ I want ya to bring Atlanta, want to met my daughter proper like.”

Carol nodded again, he smiled nodding at her, he opened the door, turning he looked at her, “Don’t worry woman, I’m gonna love ya and that little girl right through this shit.”

With that he was gone, Carol pulled her knees up and hugged them to her body. A smile slipping onto her face, he said he was going to love her through it and she believed him.


	4. Revelations

-D-

Carol woke to the sound of giggles and soft wet kisses on her nose. She cracked open an eye and smiled at her daughter. Her voice hoarse from sleep, “What are you doing my little angel?”

Atlanta giggled as her mother tickled her sides, “STAPH momma! Auntie Kayla said it’s time to get your lazy as- butt out of bed!”

Carol pulled her daughter into her side and kissed the top of the little girl’s head, “She did. Why would I want to wake up when all I love is right here.”

Atlanta sat up on one of her little elbows, smiling at her mom, “Momma! It’s a big day today. Uncle Dave said I’m a very busy princess today. So let’s get moving!”

Carol felt that fear start to churn in her stomach. Dave had spoken to her last night after Daryl left, telling her that he would go with them in the morning to meet with Daryl. Carol knew she had to properly introduce the man to their daughter, but somewhere inside that part of her that lived in fear was scared. She wasn’t sure she could do this. Atlanta had been her reason for going on and she still worried that Rick would find a way to take the little girl from him. But looking into her daughter’s face she knew she had to do what was best for Atlanta, what was best for Daryl, even if it hurt her. At least now Atlanta would have one more person looking out for her.

Carol nodded at her daughter, brushing one stray curly lock from her face, “Alright let’s get dressed.” The little girl squealed in delight heading over to the small dresser that held their clothes. Carol smirked as she sat up on the edge of the bed, “Oh and little angel don’t think I haven’t noticed the words you’ve been saying lately.”

Atlanta looked at her mother sheepishly, so much like her father in that moment, “Yes momma.”

-D-

In the kitchen of the Black-Dixon home, Norm stood with his back to the counter sipping from his coffee cup. Before Daryl had left, he told him that they were running from some lunatic named Negan. That they hadn’t seen any sign of him or his people in at least a month, but he didn’t want Negan stumbling across their community without a heads up. So Dave had gone to the newcomer’s place that morning talking with Glenn about the situation. Dave knew he would have to tell Carol, but for now he was hoping they could get through Daryl’s first visit with Atlanta without anyone dying.

He was snapped from his thoughts when his wife leaned into him kissing his chin; Kayla pulled away and smiled at him, “Penny for your thoughts?”

Norm chuckled, “Do we even have pennies anymore?”

Kayla laughed pulling away she playfully swatted at him, “Smart ass.”

Norm sighed, setting down his coffee mug, “Just worried about today. Yesterday was bad, as bad as it has been in….”

Kayla nodded, “It’s been awhile since she got like this. What I’m worried about now that she’s relax is…”

Norm looked at his wife, “Kip.”

Kayla nodded, “Kip. Daryl’s not going to like how close that is.”

Norm groaned, running his hands over his bald head, “Yeah, I will make sure to talk to him and Kip together as soon as the bastard gets back.”

Kayla wrapped her arms around her husband, “It’s gonna be fine baby.”

Norm buried his nose into her hair, “I sure as fuck hope so.”

-D-

Carol had just finished fixing Atlanta’s hair, smiling at her daughter who now had a red ribbon holding back her crazy mane of hair, “I need to tell you about something baby girl.”

Atlanta smiled up at her mother, sitting on the floor putting on a pair of tiny hiking boots, “What is it momma?”

Carol motioned for her daughter and the girl jumped up with one boot on and crawled into her lap, staring intensely at her mother. Carol tried to steady her breathing, “Baby, remember when I told you stories about your daddy.”

Atlanta smiled softly, her head nodding, her angel-like voice soft and reverend, “Yes, he saved you more times then you could count. That you met him because my big sister Sophia went missing and died. He helped you so you could have me.”

Carol nodded, “But remember I said we got…..separated.”

Atlanta nodded, a frown on her face, “Because of Officer Friendly, Uncle Kip says he’s a dick.”

Carol groaned, “Don’t say that. But yes, we got separated. But he’s here and he wants to see you.”

Atlanta was a smart girl and she looked thoughtful for a minute, her ocean blue eyes looking to her mother’s slowly, “Is he nice?”

Carol chuckled, tears welling in her eyes as she kissed the top of her daughter’s head, holding the child close for a minute, just enjoying this moment with her thoughtful daughter. She pulled away, “Yes baby, he’s very nice and he’s very glad to get to know you.”

Atlanta gave a stiff nod of her head, determination clear on her little cherub face, “Then I’m glad he’s here. We can be a family, like Uncle Dave and Aunt Kayla and Mitchell and Ella. We can live in the same house….”

Carol shook her head, “Let’s just take things one step at a time. Let your daddy get to know the both of us.”

Atlanta smiled, cupping her face, “Oh silly mommy, HE’S GONNA LOVE US!”

With that her daughter jumped off her lap and went in search of her other boot. Carol watched her hoping against hope that she would be able to do this for her daughter and for Daryl.

-D-

Daryl groaned as the light in the room he was sleeping was flipped on. He blinked hard and squinted to see Dave standing there a shit eating grin on his face, “Morning sleeping beauty, brought breakfast.”

Daryl shook his head sitting up slowly. After seeing Carol he had gotten his things from Glenn and crashed hard on the bed that Rocco had offered him. Daryl’s voice was gravelly with sleep, “Nice to see lights.”

Dave nodded leaning against the wall eating a biscuit, “Yeah, got a few egg heads we found on a run. Fuckers helped us set up the solar panels. Comes in handy in the winter, Kentucky can be a bitch.”

Daryl sighed scrubbing his eyes with his hands, when he looked up Dave had a cup of coffee in his face, the smell making   
Daryl’s mouth water, “Coffee?”

Dave grinned, “Fuck yeah, only the best around here.”

The two men fell into a comfortable silence as Daryl ate a few biscuits and drank his coffee. Dave gave him time to wake, going and grabbing a bag from another room he came back tossing it on the bed next to Daryl. Daryl opened it seeing fresh clothes, “I’m good, save these for someone who needs them.”

Dave smiled, “You need a damn shower and fresh clothes. I’ll wait in the living room, but I will be damned if you meet my niece smelling like a walker whore.”

Daryl cocked an eyebrow at the tall man as he turned and left, taking out the clothes he found deodorant and a toothbrush. He sighed, well it wasn’t everyday you met your daughter.

-D-

Carol and Atlanta walked hand and hand toward the mess hall. Kayla had asked if they need her to go with them, but Carol had assured her friend she was fine and Dave and Rocco would be there when she saw Daryl. 

Now stopping outside the doors, she felt her nerves kick in. She felt Atlanta squeeze her hand, the little girl smiling up at her, “It’s alright momma.”

Carol nodded, not saying anything because she wasn’t sure she could trust her own voice. Pushing the door she let Atlanta go in first. The first person she saw was Dave he had his back to her and turned when he heard them, giving her a smile, “Morning.”

Carol nodded, “Morning.”

Dave stepped away heading toward the far wall and her eyes landed on Daryl. Her breath caught in her throat, he had cleaned up and trimmed his scruff. She could tell he was nervous as he stood up, a rectangular pink box in his hands; he nodded at Carol not saying anything, his eyes cutting to Atlanta.

Carol gave him a soft smile and she knelt down to look into their daughter’s face, “Atlan….Atlanta baby, this is your daddy, Daryl Dixon.”

Daryl felt like he was going to throw up, he wanted to flee, the old him would’ve but he knew that he couldn’t do that anymore, he needed his daughter and she needed him. Carol needed him to be the strong now and for her he would be that if he could. He walked toward them slowly, watching Atlanta’s face he saw so much of himself there and Carol. Kneeling down slowly, his knees popping, he gave Atlanta a lopsided smile, “Nice to meet ya.”

Atlanta smiled, looking at both her parents, she knew her mother was worried and she could tell her daddy was scared. So she did what little Atlanta Dixon always did, she threw her arms around her father’s neck and hugged him.

Daryl almost fell back when she launched herself to him, but his arms wrapped around the little girl and Daryl felt tears biting at his eyes. He hugged her back hard, “Real damn good to meet ya little girl.”

Atlanta pulled away from him and gave him a smile that he knew had stolen his heart, “Is that a Barbie for me?”

Daryl laughed looking over at Carol and Dave, the woman having moved during the hug to give the two of them room. Carol had tears streaming down her face and Dave had a reassuring hand on her back, but Carol looked happy. Daryl picked up the Barbie that Dave had given him for the girl, “This what ya want?”

Atlanta put her hands behind her back biting her lip like her mother she rocked on her heels, “Yes please.”

Daryl handed it to her and the little squealed, walking over to one of the mess hall tables she sat down and started to pull apart the box to the doll inside.

Daryl wasn’t sure what to do, he looked at Carol, who gave him a smile and motioned toward the table, sliding into a seat herself. Daryl followed suit, “So ya like dolls?”

Atlanta gave him a look that made him laugh, “Duh daddy, every little girl does.”

Carol rolled her eyes, “Atlanta May, manners.”

Atlanta looked remorseful, “Sorry, but I really do like dolls.”

Carol hummed in her throat, “We’re building a doll house.”

Daryl nodded watching his daughter, “I could help. I’m good at building shi..stuff.”

Atlanta giggled, “Momma, daddy has a mouth like me!”

Carol groaned, feeling more at ease, “Yes he does.”

Daryl blushed, winking at Carol, “Never complained about my mouth before woman.”

Carol turned to look at her daughter, her cheeks blushing, he was home and even though there would never be anything other than that one night they shared, she was glad to have her friend back.

-D-

Rick sat up in bed in a cold sweat. Reaching over to Michonne’s side he found the bed cold. Looking out the window he saw the sun was up. Throwing his legs over the side of the bed he ran his hands over his face trying to get the nightmare from his mind.  
After Dave had left last night, Glenn had told him about Carol. It was in that moment that Rick realized he had seen Carol at the wolves’ camp the day they had attacked him the RV. He had been running back toward Alexandria when he stumbled across their camp. He had seen some of the wolves there and had hidden behind a tree. The sounds of whimpers had made him squint and he had seen a woman bloody tied to a tree naked, a small baby bump sticking out from between the ropes that tied her. But the sound of the horn blowing back at Alexandria had gotten his attention and he had left the woman, running toward his family.

Rick now knew that woman had been Carol. Glenn said she had followed behind them on the way to Alexandria, that the water in the road had been her. After running into Aaron she had told him not to tell them he had seen her. After everything she was still making sure the group was safe, after all he had done. Now he knew it was his fault that she had been tortured as she was, almost losing the little girl that had been the final straw to lose his best friend. He knew he had been playing God for too long, only protecting his family while he pretended to act for the group.

Now he saw what his pompous nature had done, he had almost destroyed a woman that had given everything to their group. Rick laid back on the bed, curling up on his side, tears began to stream down his face and the only thing he could see when he closed his eyes was Carol tied to that tree. He was damned.


	5. Daddy's Home

-D-

His visit with Atlanta was going good; at least he felt it was. They had stayed in the mess hall for awhile, Carol hadn’t said much but he had gotten the chance to get to know his daughter a little. He couldn’t help but laugh; she was a lot like her Uncle Merle, talking a mile a minute about anything and everything. He noticed that Carol had started to relax and was even surprised when Atlanta asked if they could go to the small play area the compound had for the kids that Carol had agree. He was even more surprised when she told Dave that they were fine, the bald man giving them all a big grin as he took off to tend to what Daryl figured were the never ending jobs that the community had.

So now he stood next to Carol watching as their daughter played with several other children on an old monkey bar set that had several little tikes toys around it. Daryl watched Atlanta, but he did side glance at Carol from time to time watching as she fussed with the bangs of her now longer hair. Daryl knew she was trying to cover that ‘w’ on her forehead.

Daryl swallowed hard, his voice light, “Her name, Atlanta, was that because of where we met?”

Carol was almost startled when he spoke and it took her a second to find her own voice, she shook her head smiling as she watched Atlanta, “No, it was something that Kip said when I was getting to the end of my pregnancy, he said when she kicked it looked like she was running a race. I studied Greek Mythology in college and it reminded me of the story of Atlanta. She was left in the wildness as a baby and became a great hunter, her speed was god-like, and her beauty the thing of legends. Many men tried to woo her into marrying them, but she wanted the woods, the calm of nature.” She glanced at Daryl and he nodded, just glad she was talking to him, “Well these men she told the only way she would marry them was if they could beat her in a foot race. Many men came and tried but they failed, she was too fast always winning. Until Hippomenes came along.”

Daryl chuckled, “Let me guess he was able to keep up with her?”

Carol smiled, “Yup, she ended up marrying him. So when I picked her name, that one seemed to fit and I swear since her little legs hit the ground she hasn’t stopped running.” She looked at Daryl and gave him a sad smile, “And May….I knew Merle’s middle name was Maynard….I knew if you were with us…” Carol looked away and he saw the tears forming in her eyes. Carol swallowed hard turning back to him, “I knew if you found us, you would be happy to know she was named after Merle, I knew how much you loved him.”

Daryl felt his own tears biting at his eyes, “Yeah, thank ya for that. It fits her; she’s a lot like him.”

Carol laughed then, the first real laugh he had heard from her, “Yeah, she is, but she’s been raised by me and a bunch of men with mouths that would make Merle proud.”

Daryl chuckled, his eye catching Glenn and Maggie walking toward the playground area with Judith and little Hershel. Daryl sighed, seeing Carol tense, leaning closer to her he whispered, “They missed ya. I promise they won’t give ya no shit.”

Carol nodded, trying to fight back the fear that gripped her, this was her family, but what had Rick said to them? Did they hate her? Taking a deep breath she gave Glenn and Maggie an unsure smile. She had missed them and she knew that Atlanta would need good people like them in her life.

Glenn smiled as he came near them, his arm around Maggie who was holding a fifteen month old Hershel; Judith had already joined the other children on the play ground. They stopped just a few feet away from them, Maggie wiping at her tears. Glenn saw the fear on Carol’s face, “Carol, it’s wonderful to see you again. We’ve all missed you.”

Maggie let a sob rip from her mouth, “Oh Carol, you look wonderful.”

Carol nodded wiping at a few tears of her own, her hand slowly reaching out to touch little Hershel’s chubby hand, “He’s beautiful.”

Glenn beamed, “Yup, looks like his mom.”

Maggie chuckled, “Well he acts like Glenn so it makes it perfect.” Maggie looked at the children and smiled when she saw the little girl that she knew to be Carol and Daryl’s, “She beautiful Carol.”

Carol nodded looking at her daughter, “Yeah.”

Glenn smirked at Daryl, “So how long was that going on at the prison, because Maggie and I were always watching to see if there was something more between the two of you.”

Daryl huffed, his face turning red, muttering, “Wouldn’t ya like to know asshole.”

Carol just shook her head, holding out her arms slowly, looking at Maggie, “Can I hold him?”

Maggie nodded, kissing the little boy on the head, “Hershel baby this is your Aunt Carol.”

Carol took the dark haired little boy that had soulful eyes that reminded her of his grandfather and held him close. “It’s really nice to meet you sweetheart.”

-D-

Daryl hadn’t been this happy in awhile, he really hadn’t. He had spent the day with Carol and Atlanta the three of them chose to have their dinner together at the Black house. Things had gone well with Maggie and Glenn but Daryl wasn’t pushing things if they ran into Rick in the mess hall. Carol let him put Atlanta to bed, reading the little girl four books before her eyes finally got heavy. As he was closing the bedroom door he heard a loud voice coming from the living room that he didn’t recognize.   
When he stepped into the living room he saw Carol being bear hugged by the same guy that had told them about Sophia’s Hallow, Kip. His fists clenched at his sides as he watched the dark haired asshole swing Carol around, but what really pissed him off was the look on her face. Carol was fucking enjoying it.

He let out a low growl that made the whole room turn to him. Dave moved closer to him, sensing that the pissing contest was about to start. While Kip set Carol down and gave him a shit eating grin, “Well bowman see you found our little heaven here.”  
Daryl nodded, not saying anything he just glared at the man, jealousy already taking root in his veins. Carol wouldn’t let anyone fucking touch her but this asshole got a free pass to fucking hug her.

Carol saw what was about to happen and she stepped between the two men, knowing that Kip enjoyed a fight and knowing Daryl would never back down from one, “Daryl, this is Kip Bishop, one of my dear friends. He…well he and I have been through the war and back together.”

Kip eye balled the growling man; he knew who he was the second he laid eyes on him when he found the group out on the road. He had listened to Carol speak of him for almost six years and he knew he needed to get the man to his family. But what bothered Kip was if Daryl loved Carol, why the fuck didn’t he look for her. So Kip knew once he made it back to Sophia’s Hallow he was going to make sure the redneck knew he wasn’t the only game in town, even if his feelings for Carol were strictly on a brother sister level, he would make sure the redneck sweat a little. “Seems you found our queen and her angel also.”

Daryl stepped closer, his voice rough with anger, “Ya mean my woman and our kid. Yeah I fuckin’ found them.”

Kip chuckled stepping closer to Carol he put an arm around her shoulders pulling her into his side, “Don’t remember her being your woman.”

Dave moved fast, getting between the two of them, his voice booming in the house, “ENOUGH!” His eyes cutting to Daryl, his voice low, “We’ll talk about this shit away from here!” He turned back to Kip who was still grinning, “You cut it the fuck out!”

Kip shrugged walking toward his pack that he had thrown on the ground, “No worries. I’m sure we can all have a nice chat.”

Carol had moved toward Kayla her eyes wide watching the men. Kayla had groaned whispering to her friend, “I swear to fucking god it’s because they don’t have television anymore, they’re worse than teenage girls with their drama.”

Carol started to say something else when they heard the bell on the wall begin to ring. Daryl’s head snapped up, “What the hell?”

Dave was already moving toward the gun cabinet in the corner, “WALKERS! Kayla…”

Kayla Black nodded already moving to the kitchen to open the trap door, “Already there my love.”

Daryl ran to the back of the house, helping Carol get the two Black children and Atlanta. He took Atlanta the girl groaning sleepily, “Oh momma, I’m too tired for this.”

Carol was ushering the two Black children down the ladder that led to the underground bunker, “I know baby, but Ella and Mitch will be with you till Uncle Rocco gets here.”

Daryl looked at her, “WHAT! No, you’re goin’ down there too!”

Carol groaned, glad when Rocco came in, “I’m HERE! GO!”

Daryl growled as he gave the older man his daughter, “With your life.”

Rocco nodded, “Don’t worry.”

Daryl grabbed his bow as they ran outside; he could see people climbing ropes up the wall to the walkway on the top. Following Carol he went up behind her and was shocked to a large size herd pushing against the wall. 

Carol scanned the herd; they were on the far Northern side of the wall all clustered up close to where people walked the few dogs that the compound held. She figured the walkers had heard the noise inside but had been attracted by the animal smell. She looked over at Dave who was a few people down from her, “Divide and conquer!”

Dave nodded, a sick smile coming to her face, “YOU HEARD THE QUEEN! DIVIDE AND CONQUER!”

Carol turned looking at Kip, “You got my back?”

Kip smirked, “Always!”

Carol and Kip took off toward the other side of the wall with several other people, while Dave took a group his way. In all the confusion he saw Rick, Glenn, and Aaron following Dave. But he was focused on following the crazy silvered woman of his. He grabbed her arm just as she started to swing her legs down a ladder that had been put up for them to get outside the wall, “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YA DOING? WE GOT A KID!”

Carol saw the concern in his face and knew it wasn’t fair for a herd to gather this soon after they came. No one had told Daryl and the others that this was how they handled herds; they paired up and fought hand to hand just like when they took the prison. She looked down and saw Kip was already on the ground waiting, looking back up at Daryl she sighed, “I’ll be fine, cover us from up there.”

Daryl growled as she shook off his hand and made her way down the ladder. He ran along the top of the wall watching as her and Kip went back to back taking down walkers as they moved. He could tell the two of them had been at this for some time. He growled as he shot another walker that was coming up behind Carol. It seemed the two of them had a lot to talk about.

-D-

Once the small herd was put down the group of walker gut covered residents of Sophia’s Hallow all gathered in the center of their little community. Daryl stood to the side with his daughter in his arms. Once he knew that the herd was done and Carol wasn’t going to kill herself doing something stupid, he had gone in search of his daughter. Now he stood there in the center of his new home waiting with the others. Dave had told them they always had a meeting after wards. What shocked him was it was Carol that crawled up in the back of a pickup that was sitting there. She smiled at them, “We did good tonight. I’m happy to report that besides one sprained ankle, we have no injuries. I want to remind anyone on guard tonight to keep an extra eye out. Tomorrow we will deal with the bodies; I want a few left near the walls to maybe distract any that might still be out there. We had a new group come in yesterday, I would like Kip and Curt to speak with them tomorrow and let them know how we run herd attacks. The rest of you good job, now get some sleep.”

Daryl watched her as she worked through the crowd of people. She gave them all an easy smile, but he noticed she side stepped a lot of them when hugs were offered. Most seemed to know their leader didn’t want physical contact. He knew she was strong, but watching her pull together the community and then kicking ass with the herd he knew she was stronger than he thought. Inside personally she was a mess but through everything she was doing what she had to do to protect this place, protect their daughter. His Carol was still in there and he was in awe of her.

That night he knew there was only one way he was going to sleep. He grabbed a sleeping bag from Rocco and his stuff. Knocking on the door at the Black house, Dave let him chuckling. Daryl walked straight back to Carol and Atlanta’s room.   
Carol was still lying in bed awake, their daughter curled into her sound asleep. Carol started to get up, but he shook his head putting his finger to his mouth motioning to their daughter. He could tell by her face that Carol was not happy with this, but he had found her and Atlanta and he was going any damn where. So with a smile on his face he settled into the sleeping bag on the floor, rolling on his side he looked up at the bed, whispering into the night, “Daddy’s home.”

-D-

Ten miles away perched on the side of a mountain watching through binoculars Negan smiled when he saw the group from Alexandria on the wall. He had been chasing these assholes for months. NO ONE got away from him without paying him what he was due. His eyes narrowed as the archer grabbed a sliver haired woman, the two having a heated discussion. It had been Daryl who had taken out his second Dwight and Daryl who had rescued that stupid ass ex sheriff from his fight pits. Now it looked as if Daryl had something important to him, something he could use. Negan’s smile got even bigger, “Well boys looks like we’re setting up roots here in Kentucky.” The army of men behind him all cheered, all of them exhausted from herding together walkers the last two days to led to the compound. Yes things were looking up for Negan.


	6. Something

-D-

Daryl woke up with a heavy weight on his chest and when he cracked one eye he saw his daughter was laying on him, her little head nestled under his chin and she had the Barbie he had given her in her hands holding her above her. He chuckled making the little girl jump, she giggled moving so she was next to him on the floor, she swatted at his arm playfully, “DADDY! You scared me.”

Daryl smirked, pulling her into his arms and kissing the top of her head letting her lay there next to him, “Well that’s what ya get for layin’ on my ass like I was a damn bed.”

Atlanta chuckled, “Why are you laying on the floor? When I woke up this morning momma said to not wake you but I wanted to so bad! So I came back in here telling her I was getting dressed, but I wanted you to wake up. Do you like pie?”

Daryl started to sit up chuckling at the little girl who was talking so fast he felt like he had whip lash, “Yes I like pie.”

Atlanta gave him a nod, “I’m going to make pie today with Uncle Rocco.”

Daryl rubbed his hands over his face trying to get awake when Carol opened the door and frowned at her daughter, “Atlanta! I told you not to wake him.”

Atlanta groaned, pouting like a true Dixon as she got up and huffed to the dresser to get her clothes on, “I know, I’m sorry.”

Daryl stood up letting his body stretch at sleeping on the hard floor, he smiled at Carol, “It’s fine, needed to get my ass up anyway.”

Atlanta took her night gown off and pulled on her shirt, “See momma, he had to get his ass up anyway.”

Daryl and Carol both shook their heads, “ATLANTA.”

The little girl grumbled under her breath, “Sorry.”

Carol bit back a laugh as did Daryl. It was hard not to with Atlanta, she was a lot like her uncle.

Carol looked up and saw Daryl staring at her hard. She felt that cold fear biting into her as she turned quickly making the bed.   
Daryl watched her, her shoulders were tense he could tell and he knew not to push her. It would have to be in her time that she came around. He sighed fixing his sleeping bag and pillow, folding it all and putting it in the corner.

When he turned Atlanta was standing with Carol at the door, but of them looking at him. Atlanta smiled, “Come walk me to school daddy.”

Daryl smiled, “Sure.” 

As they walked through the compound Atlanta talked nonstop, every once in awhile Daryl’s hand would brush Carol’s just testing the waters. He noticed that she tensed but didn’t shy away, so that was something and he could work with that.

-D-

Daryl had found Dave and Kip; he had found footprints outside the wall while he was helping move bodies. The footprints were human made, not walker. He warned the two men that it might be time to sit down with Rick and finally discuss Negan. Dave nodded saying that he needed to talk to Carol and he went off in search of her.

Daryl went to turn to leave not caring to be in the same space with Kip. As he started to walk away he heard Kip behind him, “You can’t push her.”

Daryl turned his eyes narrowing at the other man, “What the fuck is that supposed to mean? You don’t know her!”

Kip chuckled, crossing his big arms over his chest, “That’s where you’re wrong, I know her. You’re the odd man out.”

Daryl advanced his chest hitting against Kip’s, the two men standing toe to toe, Daryl snarled, “But you fuckin’ do?”

Kip nodded, “I know all of it. I know the story of what happened there at their camp because I was fucking there too!”

Daryl took a step back, his anger deflating a little, “You were there?”

Kip lifted up his bangs to reveal the ‘w’, “I was there. I was scouting for the group and moved out further than Dave wanted me too. I ran across them and they took me.” Daryl heard the other man’s voice crack, Kip looked up at him, his voice low, “After they….well it was all the time and it didn’t matter who it was to them….just a warm hole….she would talk to me…sing to me…tell me not to give up.”

Daryl didn’t know what to say, he hated the man just moments before but now he found himself feeling for the man. Kip shook his head a small smile on his face, “She got us out of there. What they did to her….just go slow and if you’re not in this for the long haul I’ll slit your throat.”

Kip put his sunglasses on and bumped Daryl’s shoulder hard as he walked passed him. Daryl growled, but deep down he knew that Kip had given him his blessing. But having Kip confirm what he had already known in his heart was hard. He knew she was broken, maybe he just didn’t realize how broken. He headed toward the gate, he needed to hunt and think before their meeting with Rick.

-D-

Carol sighed as she sat at the end of a long table, her leg bounced up and down as she went over the schedule for the week. She knew that any minute now Dave would come in the door with Kip. The two men had talked to her at great length that morning. There had been tracks leading away from the wall that weren’t walker tracks. Daryl had found them when they went out to haul away some of the walker bodies. 

Now after their talk the two men were gathering Daryl and Rick to discuss Negan. Carol wasn’t sure if she was ready yet to face Rick. She wasn’t sure she could trust herself just yet. Slamming her eyes shut she take deep breaths trying to keep herself under control.

The door to the small house they made their headquarters opened and Kip stepped in with Daryl. Both men looking like they’d rather be anywhere else. Kip walked over and kissed the top of her head and Daryl growled at the man, but didn’t say anything as he sat down next to Carol. She took a deep breath glad that at least they weren’t fighting.  
Daryl looked at her, he could see her fear about seeing Rick, so he gave her a small smile. To his surprise, she gave him one right back. That was something.

-D-

Rick had wanted to talk to her again, but he knew that wasn’t smart. He understood why she had avoided him and why the others were keeping them separate. He even understood why Daryl had taken off, he deserved whatever he got. So stepping into that office and seeing her look at him, he wanted to die. The ‘w’ on her forehead a reminder of the sin no one knew about.  
He sat down across from Daryl and Carol, Kip and Dave filling in the seats between them. Rick swallowed hard, “Carol it’s nice….”

Carol swallowed looking down at some papers in front of her, “I put you on watch duty. I figured that would work. I have job assignments for everyone but Michonne. I figured with the baby so young, she might want to take her time finding something here.”

Rick nodded, “Yeah, that was nice of you.”

Carol looked up at him giving him a smile that didn’t reach her eyes, “I’m all about nice.”

Dave cleared his throat, “We want to know about Negan. Today while we were clearing walker bodies we found human tracks leading away, well Daryl did.”

Rick looked at Daryl, “Were they his?”

Daryl bit his lip and shook his head, “Nah, but could be one of his foot soldiers.”

Kip looked at Daryl, “How the fuck can you tell?”

Daryl shrugged, “We wounded Negan, ‘Chonne damn near took his leg off when we went in to save Rick from the fight pits. He walks with a limp in his gait now. I’ve seen it since we left Virginia. We were hopin’ that the fucker stayed there, but with the large group of walkers, I thinkin’ he found us.”

Rick nodded, “He used walkers, herds against us at Hilltop. He was trying to starve us out. Gave myself over to him to save our people.”

Carol huffed, “How nice of you.”

Kip shook his head, “Carol?”

Carol rolled her eyes standing up slowly, Kip and Dave rising with her. Her eyes were fixed on Rick, “How was it on the road?”  
Rick stood up too, his fingers looping into his belt, “Carol, I’m sorry. I can’t say that enough alright. I did what I thought was best.”

Carol shook her head, “You did what YOU thought was best. If this was a television show I would wait for the fucking god like music to play. You know what you did Rick, you got scared. You KNOW what I did, I bet you haven’t said shit to anyone else about it have you?”

Daryl stood up now, “What’s she talking about?”

Rick looked down at the floor, his voice a whisper, “You said it was you.”

Carol nodded, “I finished it off. But I want to hear why Rick!”

Rick looked up slow, his eyes going to Daryl and then Carol, his voice breaking, “Because Carl couldn’t finish what he started.”

Carol rounded the table heading toward Rick, her whole body shaking, “AND DID YOUR SON TELL YOU WHY HE TRIED? THEY BEGGED HIM TO END IT!”

The whole room was silence as Carol started pushing Rick back till his back hit the wall behind him, “They begged him! They were dying! He tried with Karen, but all he saw was his mom. You remember Lori another woman that you threw aside. I finished what your son couldn’t do. Then I burnt those bodies trying to stop the spread.”

Rick jumped when Carol slammed her hands against the wall next to him, her chest heaving as she glared up at him, “You threw me out like trash. It didn’t matter if I was trying to protect Carl. You didn’t give a shit. I bet you didn’t set him free like you did me. Even after I saved you from Terminus I couldn’t be with the group, with my family. But I followed you, trying to take care of you from afar.”

She smiled at him and Rick felt his blood run cold, “Then they got me.” She pulled up her bangs letting him see the ‘w’ up close and he shivered, “They raped me and they tortured me and threatened to KILL MY BABY.” Her voice got low and Rick stared at her wide eyed, “But I didn’t die. Maybe you need someone to take your ass out there and tie you to tree for two months. Let you take it hard for a while up the ass and see how you feel. Maybe someone should.”

Kip was around the table, almost picking her up, “Time to go.”

Carol screamed at Rick as Kip carried her from the office, “SOMEONE SHOULD MAKE YOU PAY! YOU’RE NOT GOD!”

Daryl looked at Carol and then at Rick, the crossbow coming off his back as he stalked toward Rick. He shoved the arrow hard against Rick’s forehead, “I should FUCKING DO IT!”

Rick didn’t say anything at first, he just watched his best friend as he processed everything. Then he nodded his head, “Go on Daryl, do it.”

Daryl’s finger flexed on the trigger but he didn’t pull it. He let out primal scream as he kicked the table and stormed out of the office after Carol.

Dave looked at Rick, his face set firm, “Don’t leave the compound. Way I see it you might be the one thing that Negan wants and frankly I could give two shits what they do to you motherfucker.”

Rick nodded easing down into his chair, staring at his hands. He looked up slowly at Dave, “Don’t you think people deserve a second chance?”

Dave nodded, “Yeah, but some people are too far gone.”


	7. Falling Apart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warnings all around

-D- 

Kip carried Carol through the compound. She had stopped fighting him and now he could feel her silent sobs in his back, her hands clinging to his jacket as he walked. He knew how close to crumbling she was and he knew he needed to get her out of the compound before things got worse.

Walking toward the gate he yelled up to Kayla and Dave’s son Mitch, “We’re going out! Taking the truck, be back later.”

Mitch shook his head, “Dad said no one in or out.”

Kip growled walking over to a small pickup truck they used for runs he opened the door and set Carol gentle inside. He wiped at her face ,his voice low, “It’s alright sweetheart, take some breathes, we’re getting out of here.”

All Carol could do was nod, she was stuck in her own head. Reliving every moment she spent with those animals.

Kip shut the door and turned around looking up at the teenage boy, “OPEN THE FUCKING GATE!”

Mitch knew when Kip was done and he would rather tell his dad he put up a fight and finally let them go, over having Kip come up the wall and kick his ass. So the boy motioned to one of the other men on the other side of the gate and they pulled on the release to let them out.

Kip got in the truck and sped out of the compound. In the rear view mirror he saw Daryl standing there watching them go. He noticed the redneck heading for another truck and he knew he would follow. But that was good maybe it was time for him to know the truth.

-D-

Kip drove them about a mile out. He knew a place they could go that would help her, somewhere she could vent the rage that sometimes got too much for her. Pulling up to the small National Guard Post he sighed putting the truck in park. He reached over and took her hand, both of them just staring at the drooling freaks on the other side of the fence. He squeezed her hand, his voice quiet in the cab, “You know so much about me pixie. You know what every inch of me looks like thanks to those bastards. You know that I screamed like a bitch the first time they took turns on me. And I know you know I haven’t been able to be a real man since then. They broke something inside me. But I get up every damn day. I can’t have you check out on me like you did after the kid was born. We’re in this together. Remember you said that too me, every time they would bring me back. You would sing those sad country songs and tell me that I had to stay with you. Now I’m begging you to do the same.”

Carol shook her head, “You don’t understand.”

Kip growled, “The FUCK I don’t! Those assholes raped me too!”

Carol tore her hand from his, slamming open the truck door, her knife already coming out of her belt. She sobbed as she stabbed the first walker through the fence.

Kip saw Daryl pull the other truck up nearby half hidden from sight. He took a deep breath hoping he was doing the right thing. He got out of the truck and stood there watching her as she stabbed them through the fence. “What’s the matter? You took worse from that asshole you were married too before the turn.”

Carol turned on him, her face almost crazed, “NO IT WASN’T! I didn’t know there could be different then. I never knew someone could fill my heart. Someone could LOVE ME! They took all that from me, I wanted to die, I didn’t want her born to this!”

Kip knew he needed her to talk about it, not about Atlanta, “So you got took, you’re still here.”

Carol paced, her hands covered with walker muck, “I was TOOK because I loved him! I followed them to look after them! They were going to die if I didn’t find that water! I was the one who sent Aaron to them!”

Kip nodded, “And then they took you.”

Carol growled, “YES! I got knocked out when they were held up in this barn. When I woke up I was tied to a tree. They took their time, they were going to cut me up and leave me to turn. IT WAS MY PUNISHMENT! But once they stripped me they saw the baby bump. I didn’t even see it. So they wanted to keep me! Torture me until she was bigger, they wanted her to rip her way out of me! They wanted me to be alive when she did! That’s why they kept at me. Sometimes I had three on me at one time. Ripping at me, tearing me apart! Trying to kill her! IT WAS MY PUNISHMENT!”

Kip took a step toward her, “FOR WHAT?”

Carol was hysterical, she couldn’t see through the tears that were falling from her eyes, “SOPHIA!”

Kip nodded, “Because you couldn’t keep her safe.”

Carol nodded, “Yes! And I wasn’t keeping Atlanta safe.” She had her head down and she slowly started to raise her eyes to him, her voice low, “That’s why that night when she was born….I just wanted to leave her with you and Dave and Kayla…I knew you guys would protect my baby….his baby….if I was dead…if I was dead she would be safe.”

Kip stepped closer, almost close enough to hug her or grab her depending how this went, “So when we found you on that roof, you were going to kill yourself….to protect Atlanta.”

Carol nodded, tears streaming down her face, “Yes.”

She collapsed into his arms crying and he held her, his broken friend, a woman he thought of as family, “But we didn’t let you go pixie, too damn important to all of us.”

Pulling away from him a little her face crumbling with pain, “He’ll never want me….after all they did….I’m not even a woman anymore, I can’t let anyone touch me….I’m scared too.”

Kip held onto her, moving slightly as he held her close to him letting her sob. When he got them slowly turned around he saw that Daryl had made it to their truck. He saw the pain and anger on his face, and he knew in that moment that Daryl could help Carol.

-D-

Daryl had been pissed when they took off. Without even asking he took the second run truck and followed them. When they got out at the National Guard Post he felt sick as she approached the fence. Getting out of the truck he moved quietly toward them, keeping himself hidden he listened to her rage. All her pain laid out at his feet and all he wanted to do was hold her. When she allowed Kip to hold her, he inched closer watching as Kip turned them. The other man nodding at him.

Daryl slowly walked toward the two of them and when he got close enough Kip turned Carol quickly shoving her into Daryl’s arms. Carol let out a squeal and started to hit him on the chest, but Daryl held onto her, whispering in her ear, “Don’t be scared, ain’t nothin’ to be scared of anymore woman. I’m here and I ain’t going anywhere. Ain’t ever gonna be able to make up for what they did to ya, but god damn it I’ll try every fuckin’ day to make it better. I love ya Carol and I ain’t fuckin’ goin’ anywhere and I’ll die makin’ sure your ass don’t either.” 

He kissed the top of her head wrapping his arms around her tighter as she started to settle. “I came for ya woman, I came for ya. Just took my ass a long damn minute to find ya. Ain’t nothin’ broken on ya woman, just bent like the rest of us. I love ya woman, have since the quarry and I think ya know that. Ain’t going no damn where.”

Carol looked up at him slowly, her voice a whisper, “I’m scared.”

Daryl looked over at Kip, the other man laying a hand on Carol’s back for extra support, tears flowing down his face. Daryl looked down at Carol, his own tears falling, “Woman, ya got so many people around ya that love ya. Ya can be scared, just make sure ya tell one of us, so we can hold ya hand. Remember when ya first started ridin’ on the bike with me?”

Carol nodded. Daryl smiled, “I told your ass to hang on tight right?” Carol nodded, again. “Well then, that’s all this is. Ya hang onto me and I’ll get us through this shit alright?”

Carol nodded, laying her head back down on his chest, whispering, “I love you.”

Daryl had never felt his heart so light, not since he lost her, he pulled her hard against his chest, kissing the top of her head, “I love ya too woman.”

Kip nodded at Daryl a smile on his face, “Well alright then, alright.”

-D-

On the top of the National Guard building Negan stood with one of his scouts. He smiled watching the dirty redneck hug the small woman. His scout raised his rifle, “Do I take the shot sir?”

Negan shook his head, an evil smile blossoming across his face, “No, give them a few more days. Give them something to miss. In two days we ride into town and by the end of the day the ex sheriff and that little lady will be coming with me as payment for past sins.”

Two days and hell would rain down on the good people of Sophia’s Hallow.


	8. Chapter 8

Daryl was surprised when they got back to the compound that Carol waited for him as he checked in with Dave at the gate. Kip was already heading for the mess hall and Daryl knew they needed to head that way for dinner and collect Atlanta from Rocco.   
So he walked over to her and gave her a small smile, “Time for dinner, do you think we can do it in the mess hall…..with everyone else?”

Carol had been silent on their way back, thinking about things that had happen in the little time that Daryl and the others had been back. Something about him finally knowing everything made her feel lighter. She knew she wouldn’t turn Rick out, not with Carl, Judith, and Aaron to think about. She knew she would have to come to some kind of understanding where he was involved. And eating the mess hall was the first step to doing that. Smiling she took his hand nervously, “If you’ll be there, yeah.”

Daryl nodded and the two started toward the mess hall. He couldn’t believe that her hand was in his. His heart was heavy with the revelations she had finally shared but inside he had that hope that only she could give him. He was never one for much hope, but something about Carol always made him see a light at the end of the tunnel.

-D-

Walking into the mess hall he chuckled when their daughter’s face lit up, “MOMMA! DADDY!”

She ran to them and Daryl caught her pulling her into his arms and hugging her hard, “Hey peanut how was your day?”

Carol chuckled as she kissed Atlanta, “I’m going to check in on the kitchen, you two get us some food and find a place to sit.”

Daryl nodded and turned his attention back to Atlanta who was giving him a weird look, “What peanut?”

Atlanta frowned, “I don’t like peanuts daddy!”

Daryl laughed, moving them toward the buffet where their food was set up, “I’m sorry what do you want me to call you?”

Atlanta smirked up at him, “Princess! Because I’m a princess. Uncle Kip says that momma is a motherfucking queen so that makes me a princess.”

Daryl groaned, “Ok Princess, but watch your mouth. Jesus you’re like your Uncle Merle.”

Atlanta snickered, “Momma says that ALL the time.”

They got their food and sat down. Daryl knew the others had gotten there and at first he was worried about Carol. Her and Rick hadn’t done so well together that morning and he didn’t know if them being in the same room was such a good thing. He looked up and saw that Carol had stopped and was talking to Maggie and Michonne. Daryl looked over at another table and motioned for Kip, the man nodding and moving to sit by Atlanta. Daryl headed toward his group and hoped like hell his woman wasn’t going to explode again.

-D-

Carol wasn’t shocked to see them all there when she walked out of the kitchen. She had talked to Maggie and Glenn; she had played with Judith and little Hershel. But seeing Carl standing there, his eye patch reminding her of another man in this world that had one, but Carol knew that Carl wasn’t anything like that man.

Carl walked to her, his arms almost crushing her, his voice hoarse, “Carol…..I’m sorry.”

Carol hugged him back hard, “It’s fine, everything is fine.” She pulled away from him, tears streaming down both their faces, she wiped at his, “You’re so tall! When did you go and grow up on me?”

She heard a chuckle and saw Michonne standing there with baby Aaron, “He’s taller than Rick is.”

Carol smiled at her old friend, “Oh Michonne.”

The two women hugged, making the little boy between squeal out his distress. Carol pulled away and looked down at the boy, his light caramel skin and serious face a reflection of both his parents, “Oh god he’s beautiful.”

Michonne nodded, “Aaron and his husband Eric, the two men in our group, they delivered him in a ditch on the Kentucky border. The other’s were on a run and they stayed back to help with Hershel and Judith. This little one just wouldn’t wait for his daddy to get back.”

Carol’s eyes drifted to Rick who was hovering nearby, Daryl just behind him. “He’s beautiful Rick.”

Rick could’ve cried, he nodded swallowing down a lump in his throat, “Thank…thank you. Looks like his mom thank god.”

Daryl gave her a nod and she could see the pride in his face, she was trying, Jesus she was. She smiled at Michonne, “Why don’t you come sit with us and you can official meet the newest Dixon.”

Michonne chuckled, “Glenn said she’s a lot like Merle.”

Carol groaned, “God help me she is.”

Daryl couldn’t help but smile as they sat and ate their dinner together. Rick sat the furthest away from Carol. But Daryl could see that Carol was trying, though when they got closer to Atlanta and Kip Carol had panic on her face for a second. He simply grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze. Letting her know that no one was going to take their daughter from them, she had smiled back and it seemed to calm her. They talked till the kids were yawning and Daryl knew she was finally starting to heal, just baby steps, but they were getting there.

-D-

That night after a lukewarm shower Carol came into her and Atlanta’s room and stopped short. Daryl had showered before her and Atlanta, volunteering to get their daughter in bed while she did. But standing there she couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face. Daryl was pushed up against the wall on his side, their daughter was snuggled up against him, his arms were holding her and the two of them were sound asleep.

She heard someone behind her and turned to see Kayla smiling at her, “He’s good with her.”

Carol nodded, “He is.”

Kayla cleared her throat, “Be a shame to wake them, looks like plenty of room for you just to slip right in there and go off to sleep.”

Carol looked at her friend, “I don’t…I …”

Kayla cupped her face, “You can do this. I saw you at dinner, he held your hand and you didn’t panic, you didn’t flinch. He won’t hurt you and he won’t make you do anything. You’re just sleeping, with your daughter between you.”

Carol swallowed hard and nodded, “Night.”

Kayla smiled, “Night.”

Carol closed the door and walked quietly across the room turning off the small light on the dresser. Taking a deep breath she covered Daryl and Atlanta up and eased herself into the bed. Her arm going over her daughter laying next to Daryl’s. 

Her breath caught in her throat when his arm went over hers and pulled her closer to them, his voice low, “Night woman. I love ya.”

“Good night Daryl….I….I love you too.”

She couldn’t see it, but she knew he was smiling and so was she.

-D-

Negan watched as the lights seemed to go off around the small compound. He snickered to himself, these assholes had no idea what was coming for them. He stepped back, turning to his second in command, “Get Vicki, my dear has some work to do.”  
Negan turned back to the compound smiling as he did, just one more day and he would get payment.

-D-

She shook as she walked toward the large gated community. She knew they were watching her and she knew if she turned around he would order one of them to shot her. She shook as she walked, not sure just what she would do when she got inside. Negan Marshal had been her father when before the world had gone to shit. He was sixteen when she was born.  
Her grandparents had raised her, but he was always part of her life. She heard her grandparents talk about his dark side, but it wasn’t until after the dead rose that she saw it. Now six years into the turn and she had seen him go downhill, his harem of women, the men that he controlled. He had kept her safe, kept her safe from the other men. But she had angered him when she said they shouldn’t follow the group from Alexandria, she had told him that she couldn’t take anymore blood. The blood of children.

He had given her to his men that night and her hell on earth had began. Her own father.

He had come to her last night and asked her to go inside the walls of the compound and report back. But she didn’t know what she should do. Walking toward the wall she saw a man with dark black hair and piercing blue eyes step out from a small door. He smiled kindly at her, it had been a year since anyone had been kind to her, “Well to Sophia’s Hallow, are you alone doll?”  
Her bottom lip trembled, “Yes and no. Please don’t look up from me. He’s watching, Negan. Please help me…please.”  
Kip kept the smile plastered on his face, “I’m Kip sweetheart, what’s your name?”

“Vicki, Vicki Marshal and I can help you if you’ll help me.”


	9. The Quiet

-D-

The quiet is what got to you. The not knowing what was coming, the adrenaline that was right there but not ready to be released. Your heart pounding heavy in your ears, as the rest of the world stood still. The sweat pooling on your brow as you waited for what came next, the moment that would decide your fate. Your muscles tensing when the wind blew against you, your body ready for the strike but your mind knowing it wasn’t the time yet. Those few minutes before hell broke loose that you let yourself think of all the good things you did have in this life and knowing those few things were safely tucked away out of harm’s reach.

It was the quiet that sunk into your soul.

-D-

Kip hustled into the mess hall, his heart beating in his chest. He scanned the room and saw Carol sitting with Daryl and Atlanta, the little family talking softly to each other. He almost stopped in that minute, almost, she had found a way. Through everything this life and the one before had thrown at her, she had found her joy and was healing. But he knew as soon as he walked over and took her away from her family she would stand with the compound. Carol wouldn’t be one of those women to hide in the bunkers, she would fight.

Kip walked over to their table plastering a smile on his face. Atlanta looked up and ran to him, he caught her in his arms, burying his nose in her hair, damn I love this kid. “Uncle Kip! Daddy said he might teach me how to use a bow today!”

Kip looked at the little girl and smirked, “Gonna be a hell of a shot little one.”

Atlanta nodded, hugging him again. Kip looked at Carol, trying to keep his face neutral, “Hey Dave and I need to see you about the schedules if I can tear you away from here.”

Carol narrowed her eyes for a split second, “Sure, I forgot about that.” She turned to Daryl reaching across the table she squeezed his hand, “Would you mind taking Atlanta to school for me?”

Daryl nodded, “Sure. You ready princess?”

Atlanta nodded, grabbing her little book bag and shoving half a muffin in her mouth. Daryl walked over and slowly leaned in kissing Carol’s cheek, “See ya in a bit woman.” His eyes going to Kip, “Keep her safe.”

Kip nodded, his pulse quickening, “With my life.”

Once they were gone, Carol stood up and motioned for Kip to follow her. Walking through the kitchen in silence they went out the back door. Carol increased her speed, “Where am I going here?”

Kip sighed, “Welcome cabin. Negan’s kid is in there with Dave.”

Carol stopped looking at Kip; her blue eyes wide, “What?”

Kip ran a tired hand over his face, “Yeah, came in this morning. Told me not to let on like anything was wrong. Got her inside the wall and she broke down. Carol….she has restraint marks on her wrists…..he’s been letting his men have her because she fought him. She wants to help, he’s coming.”

Carol felt sick; she turned walking to the small cabin they met new arrivals at. She walked in the back door and took in the young woman in front of her. Walking over she tilted her head back and made the girl look into her eyes, her voice hard, “Are you here to hurt us?”

Vicki’s eyes welled up, “He wanted me to, but I can’t. You haven’t done anything. He’s lost his mind; he’s coming for you tonight. I was supposed to come in and get information and then get out report back to him. He….he’ll kill you all.”

Carol looked at Dave; his face was set hard and grim. Carol moved fast, her knuckle buster knife coming out she held it under the girl’s throat, Vicki whimpered. Carol glared at her, “IF YOU BETRAY US I WILL KILL YOU SLOW, these are my people! We clear?”

Vicki nodded swallowing hard, “I just want to help, please.”

Carol felt Kip’s hand on her back, “Pixie, I know it sounds weird, but I believe her. Look in her eyes, we know how that feels.”  
Carol stared at the girl’s eyes and saw the same pain and humiliation that she felt every day. Sighing she put the knife back in it’s holder on her belt. She knelt down in front of Vicki, “Will you help us?”

Vicki nodded, “I want him dead.”

Carol brushed at the woman’s tears, “That’s the plan.”

-D-

Kip took Vicki to get something to eat leaving Dave and Carol alone. Dave leaned against the wall of the cabin and sighed, “It’s war he’s looking for.”

Carol slumped into the chair that Vicki had been sitting in, “Yeah, he’s coming for this place, for what we have. How stocked are the bunkers?”

Dave chewed at his lip, “Stocked, Kayla has seen to it. What about the weapons?”

Carol stood up, “Stocked, well as stocked as they can be. We’re going to have to draw him out.”

Dave sighed, “You ready for that?”

Carol nodded, “Yeah, I’m ready. I hope I don’t get that woman killed doing it.”

Dave looked at her hard, “You going to let Daryl in on this little plan of yours?”

Carol gave him a sad smile, “One of us has to live right? What about you?”

Dave chuckled, “Kayla will kill me if I live, but she’s strong and I know she’ll take care of the kids.”

Dave crossed the room and hugged her, the two friends standing there silently together, knowing the next few hours would be hell. They would only hand pick a few to stay top side, the ones that were the best shots. Once it was said and done Sophia’s Hallow would burn to the ground and Negan would go with it. 

They pulled apart and Carol smiled at Dave, “I’ll go talk to Rocco and get him moving on putting folks in the bunkers. Then I’ll go talk to Rick.”

Dave watched her as she walked toward the door, he chuckled, “Yeah the fucker needs to help.”

Carol turned and looked at him, “No his ass is going to be right next to me, if I’m dying today, I’m taking him with me.”

-D-

Carol was glad when she got to the house that Rick and the others shared that no one was there. She knew that Rick was probably in bed the man had done night watch and was probably trying to get some sleep. 

She stepped into the house and walked quietly back to the bedrooms. She walked into the main suite and saw Rick sitting up in bed, he chuckled, “Finally here to kill me?”

Carol leaned against the door jamb, “No, Negan is outside the walls.”

Rick looked up at her slowly, his heart heavy in his chest, “You’re sure.”

Carol nodded, “His daughter came in this morning. He sent her; she was supposed to win back favor with him by reporting the layout of the compound. She’s scared, been tortured and raped by his men because she crossed him.”

Rick stood up grabbing his shirt he had just taken off, “He won’t stop until he has the compound and all of us are dead.”  
Carol stepped further into the room, “You need to get them in the bunker. Check the supplies in them and get them settled in. Make sure Glenn goes with them, tell him he’s the backup plan. If we….” Carol swallowed hard and looked away for a second, then her face hardened, “If we don’t make it, then it will be to Glenn and Carl to lead them all. But you and me, we’re going to finish this today. Dave and I have a plan, it’s going to work, just don’t know if we’ll live through it.”

Rick nodded, “Anything to protect my family…..protect your family.”

Carol started to walk out of the room; she turned giving him a sad smile, “Don’t tell Daryl, I’m going to make sure he and Atlanta are safe. Just gather them and meet me by the wall.”

Rick nodded, knowing that by this time tomorrow there wouldn’t be many of them left. He just hoped Carol would be, she needed to survive and have the family she and Daryl both deserved. Bowing his head Rick did something he didn’t often in his life, he prayed for forgiveness and strength.

-D-

Daryl chuckled as Carol and Atlanta walked him back toward the house, “What’s the hurry? We got all damn day!”

Carol glared at him and Atlanta rolled her eyes in his arms, “Daddy when momma wants to do something she wants to do it now!”

Walking into the house she was glad to see that it was empty, “Daryl, we have to be at the ready, no matter what comes at us. I promised Dave I would check the bunker for supplies, Atlanta loves doing it, I figured it was good to show you how things work.”  
Daryl chuckled, giving her hand a squeeze, “Just want to get somewhere dark and take advantage of me.”

The two of them blushed hard and Atlanta looked at him, “What’s that mean?”

Carol and Daryl chuckled as he worked on moving the rug from the trap door, “Nothin’ princess.”

Carol watched him and felt tears biting at her eyes, “I want you to go down first, that way Atlanta will be safe when she comes down the ladder.”

Daryl nodded, giving her that cocky half smile, “I remember last time…”

Carol almost choked on a sob, “STOP.”

He laughed and started down the ladder, when he got to the bottom he motioned for Atlanta not really looking around he was too focused on his daughter who Carol was handing him. He heard movement and a scream behind him, turning he saw Kayla Black, “DON’T LET HER SHUT IT!” Rocco was standing behind her his hand bleeding from where he had been covering the woman’s mouth and she had bit him. Her children looked like they were sleeping in the back corner of the bunker.  
Daryl looked up at Carol, Atlanta now safe in his arms, “What the fuck?”

Carol smiled down at him, “Atlanta be a good girl, mommy loves you. Take care of daddy. I love you both.”

Daryl set Atlanta down, half shoving her to Kayla as he rushed up the ladder, but the trap door was already shut. “OPEN THE FUCKIN’ DOOR!”

Kayla held Atlanta both of them crying, the woman looking up at Daryl slowly, “Negan’s coming, they locked us down here so we would survive. Dave had the kids knocked out when I got here. When he couldn’t get me down here, he had this asshole strong arm me.”

Rocco shook his hand, “They just wanted to make sure the kids had somebody.”

Daryl flew at Rocco grabbing him by the shirt, “TELL ME WHAT YOU KNOW!”

Rocco swallowed hard and told him about the plan, told him what was coming next. With every word the older man spilled Daryl felt like his heart was breaking. It was a suicide mission; he couldn’t let her do this.

Releasing Rocco he kissed his daughter, “Find daddy anything you can, any tools.” Turning to Kayla he growled, “Get your kids awake, we ain’t lettin’ them do this, we’re getting’ the fuck out of here and savin’ those assholes.”

-D-

It was the quiet that got you.

Carol stepped up onto the wall a compound bow strapped to her back; she squeezed Vicki’s hand and took a deep breath. Looking over she gave Rick a sad smile, the man returned it, one seeking forgiveness the other fighting as she always had in life. Two warriors in the same fight.

Carol nodded, her eyes turning back to the tree line, “NEGAN! WE SHOULD TALK!”

It was the quiet that got killed you.


	10. Shattered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Triggers....wanted to warn you

-D-

“NEGAN, WE SHOULD TALK!”

The quiet filled the compound, it seemed like no one was even breathing. Carol saw some movement near the tree line and a man stepped out. He was handsome, dark hair peppered with white, his build was lean but muscular, nothing about him said monster, he looked normal almost. On his shoulder was a wooden bat, the end covered in barbed wire. 

Carol felt Rick shift next to her, but she didn’t look at him, her eyes were trained on the man that was walking slowly toward the wall.

Negan looked up and smiled at her, his eyes lingering on her form, “Who do we have here sugar?”

-D- An hour before

Daryl grunted as he pushed the crowbar into the crack between the trap door and the floor of the kitchen, his eyes went to Kayla who was standing at the ready, “Almost.”

Kayla nodded, “I’m coming with, there is no way in hell I’m sitting this one out!”

Daryl nodded, his focus going back to the trap door, he hated that she tricked him. She knew better than this, they had brought Negan to their front door and he would be damned if he didn’t help take the bastard down.

With one last grunt the latch gave and the door popped open. He looked at Atlanta, “Listen to Rocco, daddy and mommy will be right back. We love ya.”

The little girl nodded, her face full of Dixon determination, “Be careful daddy.”

Kayla was already on the ladder handing him up his crossbow, “Let’s go.”

Once they were out of the bunker they locked the door back up and made sure the rug was over the trap door. As they headed out into the compound he stopped Kayla, “Is there a back way out of here?”

Kayla smirked, “You want to go around and attack from the rear?”

Daryl nodded, “Yeah that fucker will hide he will send in his soldiers. If I fall back I can take him out and stop all this shit.”  
Kayla started toward the back of the compound, “Let’s go. And yes I’m going too.”

Daryl sighed, knowing there was no use in fighting with the woman. He kept his head down hoping his woman was keeping her ass safe, he just had to get to Negan before Negan got to his family. He had finally found them and he sure as fuck wasn’t going to lose them now.

-D- Present  
Negan scanned the people on the wall, his smile widening, “Vicki, sweetheart, the boys are missing you. Why don’t you come down here and things will go easier on you.”

Vicki started to tremble and Carol squeezed her hand, “YOUR DAUGHTER is under the protection of Sophia’s Hollow, she’s not going anywhere with you.”

Negan chuckled, “And who are you sweetheart? You in charge here?”

Carol squared her chin, “Carol Dixon and this IS my compound. Who might you be?”

Negan shrugged, “A traveler, a man of many talents, your friend Rick there can tell you. If you do as I say I play fair.”

Rick growled, “You forgot crazy murdering bastard.”

Negan snickered, shifting the bat on his shoulder, “You were one of my favorite ‘pets’ there Rick. It’s always fun to break down an unneutered feral cat like you. Break a man down and they’ll do anything you tell them too. Too bad you’re training got cut short, if you will. Why don’t you come down here and we’ll call it even.”

Carol narrowed her eyes, “He’s under our protection also. My people aren’t going anywhere.”

Negan smiled up at her, motioning to someone behind the trees. Carol felt vomit raise up in her throat as four men pushed a tied and gagged Daryl and Kayla out of the trees. Two of the men shoved Daryl to his knees, his eyes cutting up to Carol. The other two men holding Kayla off to the side, Negan walked behind Daryl the bat coming off his shoulder he leaned on it an evil smirk spreading across his face, “Way I see it you have some things of mine and I got some things of yours. So the best thing to do is a trade don’t you think?”

Carol looked at Daryl; he was shaking his head ‘no’ at her. She felt sick, she had left him in the bunker, she looked over her shoulder at Kip who’s eyes were wide, whispering, “Check on my daughter.”

Kip nodded taking off toward the house. Carol felt Dave come up behind her, his chest heaving; he whispered in her ear, “I’ll go if he lets her go.”

Carol shook her head, her eyes fixed on Daryl but her attention on Negan, “What do you want?”

Negan whistled taking the bat he did a practice swing, “Rick there for this asshole and you for the lady.”

Daryl started to thrash around, his muffled screams under the gag making her sick. She focused her eyes on Negan, “How do I know you’ll hold up your end?”

Negan shrugged, “Rick will tell you I keep my word. Rick and I have unfinished business and you’re in charge here. I just want to talk to you, come to an accord if you will. So my little silver fox what’s it going to be?”

Dave stepped forward, “I’M IN CHARGE HERE!”

Negan snickered, “No you’re not. You’re her second at best. We’ve been watching you since those assholes got here. Please don’t hurt our relationship Carol, by letting this asshole lie. I hate liars and people die when I get pissed.”

Carol felt a hand on her back and turned to see Kip there, “She’s fine, with Rocco.”

Carol nodded, her eyes cutting to Rick. No words were said he just nodded that he would go. Carol turned her eyes back to Negan, “We’ll meet you in one hour right down there, but if you don’t hold up your side of this, if you hurt them or attack us you better hope you kill us all because whoever is left will hunt you down.”

Negan smiled, giving her a little bow, “I wouldn’t have it any other way. See you in an hour fox.”

-D-

Dave followed her down the ladder, “YOU CAN’T!”

Kip was nodding his head, “Pixie, you….we can’t let you….”

Carol turned tears in her eyes, “This is the way it is. I want to see my daughter and then we’re going to do this trade, get them away from the compound. Rick and I will work inside to get out, but you will have to get us out. I can handle anything they dish out, but I can’t live with seeing him kill Kayla and D…Daryl…this is what we’re doing.”

She looked over at Rick who was standing off to the side, “Go see your family. We leave in forty five minutes.” She reached over and squeezed his hand, “Thank you.”

Rick nodded, not saying anything he headed toward his house. Carol walked the other way toward her own; she just wanted to see her daughter, even if it was one last time.

Kip sighed, his stomach twisted in knots, “She won’t survive this.”

Dave ran a hand over his bald head, “She’s stronger than we think and she’s got Daryl and Atlanta. We have to have faith in her, that she knows what she’s doing. Come on we have to make plans before the hand off.”

Kip snorted, “And find elephant tranquilizers because we’re going to have one pissed the fuck off Dixon on our hands.”

-D-

Carol opened the door to the bunker and smiled at Rocco, “Send her up to me.”

She sat down on the edge her feet sitting on the ladder. She felt tears biting at her eyes when Atlanta was finally in her arms. She buried her nose into her mess of curls, taking a deep breath of the scent of her daughter. She kissed the top of the girl’s head, “You’re always going to be my good girl, you know that?”

Rocco was standing at the bottom of the ladder staring up at her, “What’s going on?”

Carol didn’t answer, she just pulled Atlanta back a little, tears rolling down her face as she ran her hands over her daughter’s face, taking in every freckle, “You look so much like me and daddy, did you know that?”

Atlanta nodded, “Is daddy ok momma? He was really mad when he left earlier.”

Carol swallowed hard, “He’s fine baby, just really busy, but he’ll be here soon. But momma has to go and talk to some men for awhile. I don’t want you to worry, I’ll be back, daddy will make sure. I just need you to be a good girl and help out where you can and listen good.”

Atlanta smiled, wiping at her mother’s tears, “Of course momma, I’m a very good girl.”

Carol nodded, “I love you…I love you princess.”

Atlanta hugged her hard, “I love you too mommy.”

Rocco looked up at Carol, his eyes filling with tears, “Oh Pixie…..”

-D-

Daryl was shoved hard as they walked back into the clearing. They had been stupid, he had thought for sure that Negan wouldn’t be that close to the compound but his men were hiding in the trees. They had taken him and Kayla within minutes of them entering the woods. Now he had put everyone in danger. He felt sick as they pushed them toward Carol and Rick who were waiting just outside the wall. He was glad to see every damn gun in the compound pointing down at Negan and his men during the exchange.

Carol stood up tall and proud, trying to hide what a mess she was inside. “We held up our end now let them go. Once they’re free my people will back up. No one has to die today.”

Negan smirked, “Your people pull back now or no deal, lover boy here gets to meet Lucille.”

Carol crossed her arms and Daryl thought she even looked scary, “NO, I have no idea how many men you have out there. Let them go this isn’t a trick.”

Negan eyed her and nodded to his men, the men letting Daryl and Kayla go. Daryl felt someone behind him cut the ropes that held his hands and he yanked the gag from his mouth, he pointed to Negan as he grabbed Kayla’s arm steering the woman toward the wall, “I’m coming for you, don’t you fuckin’ touch her, ya hear?”

Negan shook his head, “I don’t rape women, they come to me.”

Daryl growled and felt a small hand on his back, his eyes cut to Carol, “Don’t.”

Daryl felt tears welling in his eyes, he wrapped his arms around her, “Don’t do this, run inside we can fight them.”

Carol shook her head, “I got this, go on now, I need you to take care of Atlanta. Please Daryl.”

Daryl shook his head, “NO!”

Carol cupped his face, “I love you.” She smiled at him, “Always have, always will. Nothing will break that. Please…..take care of our girl. Don’t forget me, don’t let her forget me.”

Daryl sobbed holding her close to him, “I love ya woman, please don’t go.”

Carol closed her eyes, she knew she had to go, she knew this was for the best. Her, Dave and Kip had a plan and it wouldn’t work if she couldn’t get Negan away from the compound. She pulled away from him, reaching for Rick’s hand, her eyes on Daryl, “Go on now. I love you.”

Daryl watched helplessly as she walked toward Negan with Rick, he felt a hand on his back and turned to see Kayla’s tear stained face and he knew he had to get the woman inside. When he turned around Carol and Rick were gone, so was Negan and his men. 

Daryl fell to his knees and felt his world shatter; he was losing her all over again.

It was the quiet that was scary, but it was when that quiet was shattered. The moment right after the silence was broken, that was the moments when you figured out who you were and what you were made of.

Daryl wiped his face and stood up; he knew he had to find her. He always found her and he wasn’t letting her go.


	11. Inhale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Triggers....just warning you....

-D-

Carol bounced against Rick as the van moved down the road. Once they were clear of the compound two black bags were thrown over their heads and they were rushed to what Carol could only assume was an old cargo van. She felt Rick grunt as they hit another hole in the road, both their hands were tied behind them and she was seriously wondering if her plan would work at this point. She was putting herself in a situation that might end up killing her, if not physical, but mentally. She moved her hands the best she could and found Rick’s hands and squeezed his fingers, her voice a whisper, “I forgive you. If we don’t make it, I forgive you.”

Rick had been holding it together since they left the compound but he felt his throat close up as Carol spoke, “Thank you.”

“SHUT THE FUCK UP BACK THERE.”

She squeezed his fingers once more and shifted away from him, she didn’t want anymore attention on them. She would deal with Negan, but first she had to get herself ready for what came next. She prayed for her family that she could do this.

-D-  
Daryl was on autopilot as he walked through the gates of the compound. He felt Kip grab his arm and then he was being drug across the compound toward the house. He couldn’t remember how they got inside; he couldn’t even remember what happened to Kayla. As Kip shoved him into a chair, he looked at the man, “Where’s Kayla?”

Kip shook his head, “With Dave, she’s fine.”

Daryl looked at Kip, “How did you get a bloody lip?”

Kip huffed; going into the kitchen he ran some water over a rag. When Daryl got Kayla to the gate he started to turn around and follow Carol, it was like he had a snap with reality because he went nuts when Kip tried to keep him back. For the plan to work they needed Daryl with them, not following Negan. So Daryl in a blind rage had swung on everyone that was standing at the gate. 

Walking back toward him, Kip pressed the wet rag to Daryl’s eyebrow. Daryl hissed, “Did ya hit me?”

Kip nodded, looking at the cut that was still bleeding on Daryl’s head, “Yeah, you were nuts brother, I’m sorry.”

Daryl looked broken, almost childlike, “She’s gone again, I’m always following her ass somewhere. What if I can’t find her this time?”

Kip dropped down in a crouch and stared Daryl in the eye, “Listen, she’s wearing a bracelet that one of our guys put together. It has a transmitter. Your Eugene said he could get it working and we can track her! We can go in there and knock that son of a bitch down but we need you here brother, not following after her on some fucking death mission. You have to stick in here with us. You with me?”

Daryl nodded slowly, “Yeah, yeah I just can’t lose her….couldn’t go on without her.”

Kip picked Daryl up by the front of his shirt, “Don’t ever EVER fucking say that. That woman has done EVERYTHING she could to take care of your daughter. If something happens to her, you will be fine, we’ll all help you, but you have to hold your shit together for your kid. You got me? We need you for Atlanta and to get Carol back!”

Daryl nodded, his heart was breaking, but he could hold it together as long as he got Carol back in the end. He had to hold it together, for her.

-D-

Carol had been shoved into large room that looked like it once was an office of sorts. There was a couch and chairs against large windows and it looked like they were at least four stories up. They were in some kind of power plant or factory. She wasn’t sure; the window faced the parking lot. It looked like Negan and his men had been hard at work the whole place was surrounded by semi trucks, no way in or out unless one of them were moved. She hugged herself and felt sick as she thought of the compound and her people. She hoped like hell the bracelet was working like it was supposed to be, they were putting a lot of faith into Rick’s Eugene.

Sighing she turned sitting down in one of the chairs her eyes focused on the door. She knew what the plan was and hadn’t shared it with anyone. She would see her opening and take it, no matter what happened, she had to keep everyone safe. She just hoped Rick could hang on, she had no idea what they were doing to him at the moment and it terrified her.

The door opened and Negan walked in, a wide smile on his face, “Well I see you made it in one piece.” He walked in and looked out the window, “It’s not bad here, not as nice as the place we had that Rick and your robin hood blew up, but it’s not half bad.”

Carol took him, “So what do you want from us?”

Negan smiled, sitting down on the couch so he could look at her better, “Well it’s really simple. I don’t make anyone do anything they don’t want too. We all have choices. If you’re nice to me, then Rick will be fine and your people will be fine.”

Carol narrowed her eyes at him, “What do you mean?”

Negan leaned forward, “Well I want to have breakfast with you in the morning. I’ll make sure my guys stuck close to home tomorrow morning and Rick will eat. If you don’t feel like it, Rick won’t eat and me and my guys will have to go to that compound of yours and find me someone more willing until you cave.” Negan leaned back, clicking his tongue, “So really my silver fox, the ball is in your court.”

Carol closed her eyes, hoping that she was strong enough to do whatever she had too. She had to be, opening her eyes she nodded at Negan, “We have a deal, just make sure you keep your end.”

-D-

Dave moved them all as fast as he could. Moving a group of almost seventy through the series of caves was a nightmare. Thank god they had Abe and Glenn helping them, not to mention Rick’s oldest kid who was bringing up the rear with Kip and Daryl. The plan was simple, get them all out. Lock down the compound so nothing got in and take the whole group into the mountain where they had a cavern filled with supplies and weapons, it was the finally fall back spot. Carol’s last words to him were keep them all together, make sure they all live.

Dave closed his eyes willing back tears, he wasn’t a man that cried often, but he knew what his friend was planning on doing and it broke his heart. Hopefully he and Kip would be able to put her back together IF they got her back. He just hoped they would be able to put Daryl back together too.

Looking back over his shoulder he nodded to Daryl, the man nodding back. Atlanta on his shoulders, her Barbie doll in a death grip in her hand, “Tell me again daddy. Tell me where momma went.”

Daryl had been having the same talk for the last twenty minutes, “Momma had to go talk to someone baby girl and she’ll be back.”

Atlanta growled, Daryl could feel her tensing on his shoulders, “But we’re goin’ to the safe place and momma always said it was a last place to go, before we run! I WANT MOMMA!”

Daryl groaned, moving to the side of the cave so he didn’t block anyone else, he took Atlanta off his shoulders and stood her up, crouching down he looked into her eyes. She looked so much like her mother it made his heart hurt, his calloused hand coming out to rub her cheek, “Momma is saving all of us, she went to talk to the bad man with Mr. Rick. Try and work something out. We’re only taking everyone somewhere safe. I’m going to leave you with Uncle Dave and Aunt Kayla and then me and some others are going to get your momma.”

Atlanta’s eyes welled up and her chin trembled, “Promise?”

Daryl swallowed hard, “Promise baby girl and I don’t make ones I can’t keep. Now be a brave girl for me and help daddy get everyone safe, ok?”

Atlanta nodded, putting on a brave face, “Ok daddy, for momma.”

Daryl smiled at her, “For momma.”


	12. Exhale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> EXTREME WARNINGS...Triggers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warnings.....

-D-

Daryl watched as everyone settled down in various positions in the large cavern. Kip had shown everyone the small pathway to the outside just in case someone needed to use the bathroom they could go out and find a tree on top of the mountain. 

Daryl sighed as he headed toward Kayla and Atlanta his daughter trying to help everyone set up their own little areas in the cavern. He smiled when he got to her, “Ready for bed kiddo?”

Atlanta looked up at him her face showing the exhaustion she was fighting, “Daddy I need to help Aunt Kayla.”

Kayla smiled at her, “Go on with your daddy and show him where you set you, daddy, and momma up at.”

Atlanta gave her aunt a firm nod and grabbed Daryl’s hand leading him to a small area where three sleeping bags were pushed together, her little Barbie sitting on one. She beamed up at him, “Well daddy? Did I do good?”

Daryl smiled kneeling down next to her, taking in their little makeshift home, “Yes baby girl, you did great. How about you sit with daddy till I have watch?”

Atlanta watched as her father sat down hard on his sleeping bag, leaning against the cavern wall, he motioned for her and she climbed up into his lab hugging him hard, “I love you daddy. I’m glad you finally found me and momma.”

Daryl closed his eyes taking in his daughter’s scent, “I’m glad too baby.” He opened his eyes and stared at his daughter, “How about a story? What do you want to hear?”

Atlanta thought for a minute and then she smiled, “The one about you and momma meeting for the first time.”

Daryl smiled, running a rough hand gently across his daughter’s face, “Well that had to be the quarry, but when I first knew your momma was my woman, well that was because of your big sister Sophia…..”

-D-

“I hate him you know?”

Negan raised an eyebrow pouring Carol a glass of wine, “Hate who my fox?”

Carol smirked, drinking some of the wine and playing with the glass when she set it down, “Rick. I hate him.”

Negan chuckled, “Really? I do too, why don’t you tell me why you hate him?”

Carol took another drink of the wine, her eyes soft as she thought back to Rick leaving her on the side of the road, she looked up to see Negan hanging on every word she said. Her plan was working, “Well he left me. Kicked me out of the group, I was pregnant at the time. I didn’t know that when he did it, but it wouldn’t have mattered to him.”

Negan nodded, leaning back in his chair, their dinner eaten and the moon shining through the big windows of the office, “He thinks he’s a god in this world. I saw that in him when I first ran into them. But what about your husband?”

Carol felt her heart race at the mention of Daryl, she shrugged, “Not my husband.” She took another drink of wine, telling herself that Daryl was so much more to her, he was her soul mate and she loved him enough to make sure Negan NEVER got near him. “He was someone to pass the time with. I figured I was too old to get pregnant, but I was wrong; don’t get me wrong I love my daughter.”

Negan nodded leaning in his large arms resting on the table, “So you don’t love him?”

Carol hated herself, but she leaned forward slowly tracing her fingers down Negan’s arm, “No.”

Negan stood up filling her wine glass and his, holding his hand for her, he helped her to the couch sitting very close to her, “Well this is romantic isn’t it?”

Carol felt sick, but she had done this with Ed, she smiled at him, “Oh yes it is.”

She tried to focus on her breathing as he leaned in his lips brushing hers. She felt his hand go to her neck, she waited for him to tighten the hand around her neck, but he didn’t. He softly caressed the flesh as he deepened the kiss, his tongue darting into her mouth. She wanted to die as he pulled away, his eyes filled with lust, “We’re going to have so much fun together my fox, you might be my favorite wife yet.”

Carol set her glass down and smiled at him, her hand going to his face, “I hope I’m all you hoped for.”

Negan chuckled, his hand moving up her leg and brushing up and down her thigh, “Fuck you’re beautiful. How long it’s been since someone fucked you good fox? Made you scream their name?”

Carol moved straddling him, her hands fisting in his hair, she stared at him, “A long time.”

She crushed her lips to his, biting back the need to vomit as she rolled her hips into his feeling his erection digging into her. She pulled back when the faces of the wolves flooded her mind, if she lost herself too soon she wouldn’t be able to do this and she would end up getting them all killed. She could do this, it was just like being with Ed, she could check out. She smiled at him, “Not here my dear.”

Negan smirked, his hands now massaging her breasts through her shirt, “No my fox. I have a surprise for you. I’ll have one of my men bring you to my room. You just be ready when you get there.” His lips crushed hers and he kissed her as he stood up dropping her back down on the couch, “Soon my fox.”

As he left locking the door behind him, Carol pulled the steak knife out of her boot looking at it. She would do what she told Andrea to do to the governor, she would give him the best night of his life and then she would stop him. She would protect her family, she would protect her child, she would protect Daryl, even if she lost herself.

-D-

“….so there I was looking for you sister and I fell down this big ravine and about killed my ass.”

Atlanta chuckled, “What happened next?”

Glenn and Maggie had come over with their son Hershel along with Carl and Michonne. Glenn laughed, “Well your daddy here ate a raw squirrel, tied his shirt around the arrow in his side, killed the walkers and ended up walking back into camp with his crossbow dragging and a necklace of walker ears around his neck.”

Atlanta made a disgusted face and looked at him, “Daddy?”

Daryl groaned, wanting to punch Glenn, “Let me tell ya what really happened little bit.”

-D-

She was left alone in his room, she looked around at the office, a large full size bed was shoved in the center with red silk sheets. She rolled her eyes; of course this asshole has silk sheets. Going to the bed, she slips the knife between the mattress and the box springs. Standing up just as he walks in, to her horror Rick is with him. Her former friend attached to a dog leash. 

Negan smiles pushing Rick into the corner of the room, “Stay DOG.”

Rick looks up at Carol and then Negan, “Let her go and do what you will with me.”

Negan chuckles looping the dog leash around the door knob of the closet. Rick’s hand are cuffed in front of him and his legs have a heavy chain running between them, but other than that, he isn’t hurt and for that Carol is glad. She has to get him back to his family, back to his sons and Judith.

Negan stands up and smirks at Carol, “Well I figured when we’re done, we can kill him together. Would you like that fox?”

Carol smiles coldly at Rick, “Yes I would.”

Negan runs his hands up her arms, “So beautiful now let’s get you out of these clothes.”

Carol steps back eyeing Rick, “Not with him here, put him in the closet, I don’t want him to see me like that. That’s only for you Negan.”

She leans forward running her hand down his scruff on his cheek and he hums closing his eyes. Snapping them open he smiles at her, “Whatever you want my fox.”

He walks over yanking Rick onto his feet, “You heard the lady. In the closet dog!”

Rick shakes his head at Carol, “NOT LIKE THIS! Don’t….”

Negan punches him, shoving him into the closet. Kneeling down he shoves an old shirt into Rick’s mouth, “That should keep your ass quiet.” Negan leans in close, “But you’ll hear every fucking sound as I fuck her good and proper and she’s going to beg for it.”

Rick’s eyes go wide as he looks at Carol before the door shuts. He thrashing trying to get free when the door shuts but it’s useless, he is trapped and he’s failed Carol yet again.

-D-

“Daddy tell me again, tell me about the prison! Tell me about how you and momma kept your relationship secret.”

Glenn stared wide eyed at Daryl, “Yes Daryl, please tell us all how you kept that from us.”

Daryl groaned, “Y’all too damn nosy and it’s time for you to go bed princess.”

Atlanta groaned, “I don’t want too. I want to wait up for momma.”

Glenn and the others started to get up and head back to their own areas. Daryl stared down at his daughter, tucking her into the sleeping bag, “Little bit, she’s still talking things out with this man. But she’ll be here soon.”

Atlanta’s little eyes welled up with tears, her hands holding onto Daryl’s, “I’m scared for her daddy.”

Daryl felt his own eyes well up, “Me too kiddo.”

Atlanta looked up at him, “Aunt Kayla says when you’re worried about somethin’ that you should pray about it. We should pray for momma to come home safe daddy.”

Daryl had never really prayed a day in his life, but he nodded and bowed his head, listening to his little girl, “Dear God, me and my daddy are sad tonight because momma ain’t here. Will you please send some of your angels to watch out for her, make sure she’s alright. Maybe my big sister Sophia?” Daryl felt a tear drop from his eye, “And bring momma and Mr. Rick back to us, we miss them. Thank you God and bless all the puppies.”

Daryl chuckled looking up at his daughter, “Bless all the puppies?”

Atlanta yawned her little eyes already heavy with sleep, “I want one and momma always says if we find some puppies. So I always ask him to bless the puppies.”

Daryl nodded laying down next to his daughter, watching as she drifted off to sleep. He closed his eyes sending up his own prayer for his woman where ever the hell she was. She had to be safe, she had to come back to them, he and Atlanta needed her.

-D-

Carol had checked out for some time now. Her clothes were on the floor and she didn’t let herself think about what he was doing to her body. He didn’t say anything about the scars that marked her body; he just used her for what he wanted. She moaned and put on a good show, making sure that he really thought she was into him. She hated herself as she flipped him, straddling him, her hands on his chest as she rode him. “You like that big cock don’t you fox?”

She smiled sweetly down at him, her hand inching across the mattress to the knife. She hated herself, why was she wet? She didn’t want him! She wanted Daryl! If she wanted a man ever again, it would only be Daryl. She felt Negan’s hands dig into her hips and she knew he was going to cum; she wouldn’t let him cum inside her. Moving fast she raised the knife and moved her hips letting him fall from her. His cum shooting out onto the bed while her knife dug into his eye hitting his brain. 

She screamed as she brought it up again, this time hitting him in the neck. Negan was dead, but Carol wasn’t done. It would NEVER be enough. She thought of his daughter, the poor girl suffering at the hands of his men. She thought of herself suffering at the hands of the wolves.

When she finally came back to herself she couldn’t even recognize that the man she was straddling was a man. Pulling herself off him she stood there staring at the knife in her hand. She had let this man touch her, what was she thinking? Her chest heaved as she started to move the knife toward her, it would be better this way. She could end it and no one would ever know what she did to keep them safe. HE wouldn’t have to know.

Her head snapped up when Rick busted out of the closet his face covered in sweat. His hands were free, but his feet weren’t. He looked at her, standing there, what was left of Negan’s body on the bed and her naked covered in blood with the knife. He held up his hand, “Carol….think of Atlanta…your little girl needs you….Carol….look at me…it’s Rick. We’re going to get you cleaned up and get the hell out of here. Then we’re going to go home.”

Carol shook her head, tears running down her face, she moved the knife again. “CAROL! I need you. You have to help me!”

His hand closed around the knife and he threw it across the room, letting her crumble in his arms. He held her kissing the top of her head, “I got ya Carol. I got ya, he’s dead. You saved us.” In his mind he wondered if anyone could reach her now. He at least hoped Daryl could.


	13. Saint to Sinner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Character Death.....Triggers still apply

-D-

Rick had found the keys to the chains between his ankles in the pocket of Negan’s pants. After he completely freed himself he guided Carol into the bathroom that was attached to the bedroom. Putting her under the spray of the shower he helped her clean up, finally pulling away when she seemed to snap out of the trance like state. She sobbed as she scrubbed her skin till it was almost bleeding in places. Turning off the water he got her out of the shower and helped her dress. He kept talking to her, “No one has to know what happened here. Not if you don’t want them to know.”

Carol’s eyes were vacant and Rick hated himself for all the things that she had already been through. He knew that most of her pain since the end of the world was on him. He left Sophia, resulting in the girl getting bitten. He was the one who put her down, making his sin that much more. Then he pushed Lori on her when he couldn’t deal with his own wife. At the prison he counted on Carol to handle everything he didn’t want to, never once saying thank you even when the woman was raising his children. Then the complete sin, he left her on the side of the road, sending her into the arms of the wolves. Now she had sacrificed her mind and body to kill a man he couldn’t.

Rick swallowed hard, running his fingers through Carol’s hair, he gave her a sad smile, “That’s better. Now we have to move, it’s going to take both of us to get out of here.”

Carol gave him a barely there nod and the two of them slowly opened the door peeking out into a long hallway. When they saw only one guard, Rick grabbed Negan’s knife off the man’s pants and advanced behind the man, burying the knife into the base of his skull killing him. That’s when they heard the loud explosion, the ground rocking. Rick looked at Carol a smile coming across his face, “I think our ride might be here.”

-D- 

Once Atlanta was asleep Daryl motioned for Kayla to come sit with his daughter. He made his way toward Kip and Dave, both men were deep in conversation with Glenn and Abe, “When we leavin’?”

Dave shook his head, “Too risky. We think you should hang back, for Atlanta.”

Daryl growled, his hands going to the bigger man’s shirt yanking him closer to Daryl, “You’re fucking crazy if you think for one GOD DAMN MINUTE…..”

Kip got between them, “Whoa, let’s all just hang on a minute here. We all go Dave; we might need him to help with Carol.”

Dave growled at Daryl, “If you die she’ll never fucking forgive me!”

Daryl huffed, “I guess I better not fucking die then.”

Daryl waited outside the cavern while the others said their goodbyes. His eyes going to the moon that he had stared at so long while he searched for her, “I’m coming woman, just hold on and don’t do anything stupid for fuck sakes.”

He heard noise behind him and Dave nodded at him; the others fell in behind them as they started into the night, each man ready to lay down their lives for the woman who had already saved theirs.

-D-  
Finding the run down factory hadn’t taken them too long. Daryl and Dave scanned the area and Daryl snickered when he saw large propane tanks, “I got an idea, it’s a hell of an idea.”

Dave looked at him like he was nuts, “Oh yeah, what idea is that?”

Daryl smiled, “She taught it to me. Just give me a second.”

Dave watched as Daryl took his dew rag and set it on a rock. Next he pulled a Zippo lighter from his pocket and used his knife to take it apart. He poured the lighter fluid from the Zippo onto the dew rag and wrapped it around the tip of an arrow. 

Dave laughed, “Fucking fire, should’ve known. Your old lady is a damn fire bug.”

Daryl smirked, “Just light the fucking thing when I say.”

Once Daryl had the crossbow lined up he nodded to Dave, the other man lighting the dew rag soaked in lighter fluid. The arrow flew through the air and slammed into the propane tank piercing the side the explosion rocked the factory. Dave motioned to the others to move as they heard Negan’s assholes rushing to see what was happening.

They advanced using the smoke from the explosion they started taking them out. When they got to the first of Negan’s men Dave snarled to them, “DON’T LEAVE THEM ALIVE!”

Daryl didn’t really remember anything as he killed man after man, his mind a blur as he moved through the factory. He had to get to her no matter what he wanted to make sure she was safe.

Opening a door to a stairwell his crossbow was right in a familiar face, Rick. 

Rick smiled, “Good to see you.”

Daryl nodded, “Carol?”

Rick turned, “Carol, come on.”

When Rick pulled her into his view he wanted to puke, something was very off with her. She was ashen colored and she was shaking. He pulled her into his arms, kissing the top of her head, “Jesus woman I’m so fucking sorry. Thank Christ you’re alright.”

Carol whimpered in his arms and he looked at Rick who just shook his head, “No time, we need to get her home.”

Daryl nodded, holding onto her hand he pushed them back out into the courtyard of the factory. Dave and Kip were pinned down by several of Negan’s men. Daryl kept Carol behind him, feeling her shake into his back as he pulled his own gun shooting at the men trying to get Kip and Dave an opening to take one of them out. His attention was focused on the fire fight he never saw the man sneaking up behind them, not until he heard Carol scream.

-D-

Rick saw it all happening in slow motion and he knew what he had to do. The man came up on Daryl’s blind side; he saw Carol’s face as she moved so she was covering Daryl with her own body her scream piercing the air as the man raised his gun. Rick ran jumping in front of Carol, his body taking the blast from the gun. Fire tore through his gut as he hit the ground hard.

Daryl turned firing at the man, hitting him square in the head. Carol was already at his side, “Oh God Rick!”

Rick coughed up blood looking up at her, “I saved you for a change.” Coughing she rolled him on his side.

Carol stared at the ever increasing blood that was pooling around Rick and soaking his shirt. Tears welled in her eyes, “Oh Rick, I’m so sorry.”

Rick coughed, “No, I’m sorry. For ALL of it. Please forgive me.”

Carol nodded, moving she pulled his head into her lap, her hand feeling cool on his forehead, “I forgive you. I do. Thank you for everything.”

Rick coughed, his eyes struggling to stay open, “Michonne….tell her…I love her…..make sure …..Aaron and Judith….know about me…..take care of Carl….please Carol…no one ….knows him….like you and Daryl…..”

Carol nodded, her tears flowing down her face, “I will, everyday.”

Daryl came over and knelt next to her, he couldn’t breathe, “Rick.”

Rick smiled, moving his hand he reached for Daryl’s, “She saved us all….she killed him. …..always was the strongest of us all…take care of her brother.”

Daryl nodded, “Of course…..Rick…RICK!”

The gun fight was over and the others stood around them now, giving them cover. Glenn knelt down at Rick’s feet the man sobbing quietly. Carol kept wiping at his forehead. Daryl shook him, “RICK!”

Carol shook her head looking up at him, “He’s gone baby.”

Pulling out her knife she shook as she moved toward his temple. But Glenn put his hand over hers, his eyes blood shot, “It should be all of us.” Nodding to Daryl, Daryl put his hand over Glenn’s and all three of them push the blade into his head, making sure that Rick Grimes finally found the peace that he hadn’t had in their world.


	14. Alone In My Mind

-D-

Staring at her hands she didn’t say anything as they van moved them toward Sophia’s Hallow. Her eyes were trained on the blood of the man who had created her biggest nightmares, but yet had saved her in the end, Rick Grimes. Carol knew deep down that at one time Rick was a good man, doing what he thought was best for his family in this world gone crazy. Sighing she felt Daryl shift closer to her, he hadn’t moved from her side since they got into the back of the van with Rick’s body. His nose was buried in her hair and his arm tight around her as they drove. She wanted to curl up and die, she wanted to shove him away and tell him that she was disgusting; she was a piece of trash. But she couldn’t, exhaustion was hitting her and she knew sleep would take her soon. So she kept her mouth shut and tried not to tense when he shifted closer still. She wanted to see her daughter, hold Atlanta, remind herself that she was needed, no matter what a mess she was or how much she deserved to die.  
-D- 

Daryl couldn’t speak after they loaded Rick’s body into the van that Dave and Kip had found. He didn’t know what to say. He just wanted to hold onto Carol, he could feel her slipping away from him and he knew that holding her tight would at least remind him that she was alive and he could work with that. So he held her tight against him and his eyes scanned the van. Dave and Kip driving while Abe sat near Rick’s head, Carol behind Dave, then him, and then Glenn next to him. Almost as if their group was keeping a silent vigil over the man that had lead them for so long. Rick had made his mistakes, but in Daryl’s mind saving Carol like he did, he redeemed himself. He wouldn’t let her slip away, not now, not with Rick giving up his life for her; he would pull her back to him somehow, no matter what.

-D-

They could see the others filing out of the cavern as they pulled up in the van. Glenn and Daryl got out first and Carl ran to them, his eyes going to the trap covered body in the back of the van. Daryl put his hand on the young man’s shoulder, “He fought hard. Saved Carol.”

Carl shook his head, “No, not my dad, not after…..we made it through so much….oh god.”

Carol stood there staring at the boy and was shocked when Carl ran to her, the boy sobbing in her arms. She held him hard against her, her eyes going to Daryl her guilt eating away at her. She didn’t say anything, she just held onto Carl hoping the boy would understand what a hero his father had been in the end.

Michonne had stayed strong until they went to bury him. They had carried him through the caverns to the compound, he was a hero and he was one of them, so he would be buried in the cemetery inside the compound. Carol had walked in front of the group Atlanta curled around her, Daryl stayed back with the others, helping carry Rick. When they got inside the compound, it had been Carol who started to dig. She didn’t say anything; she just set down Atlanta and started to dig. Glen and Daryl joined her, both men feeling like this was a job for the original group. Dave and Kip had offered to help, but they waved them away. Carl had come not too long after and started shoving along side of them. The four of them making quick work of it. 

Michonne and Carl had put Rick’s body into the ground. The widow standing at the foot of her husband’s grave holding onto her infant son that looked so much like his father. Michonne smiled at Carol, “He wanted to make it up to you. I’m glad….if he had to go…I’m glad this is how he did it.”

Carol smiled sadly at the other woman, they had talked earlier and Michonne knew what Rick’s last words were. Rick Grimes had been a better man after falling in love with the quiet warrior woman. Rick Grimes died as he had lived, protecting his family. A few days later a wooden marker was added, it simply said, Rick Grimes, Father, Husband, and Brother. Daryl had craved it in private, his tears mixing with the wood as he craved.

-D-  
Carol sat on the bed waiting for Atlanta to finish up in the bathroom. It had been a week since they lost Rick. In that week Sophia’s Hallow was slowly making it’s way back to normal. She didn’t say much, she did what she had to with the day to day, but she really had kept to herself. She hadn’t seen much of Daryl, she knew he was hurting too; losing Rick was like a dark shadow hanging over them. 

Her head snapped up when the door opened and Daryl stepped inside. He nodded to her, “Atlanta in the bath?”

Carol nodded, “Yeah just waiting on her, would you like to put her to sleep tonight?”

Daryl nodded staring down at his hands, his voice was rough as he slowly looked up at her, “We need to talk about what happened back at the factory….with Negan….how did you….get the drop on him?”

Carol looked up at him, “I stabbed him, with a butter knife I sharpened.”

Daryl bit his lip, “How did you get so close to him?” Daryl had thought about this since they got back and he knew the answer, there was only one way he could think of that a woman Carol’s size would get the drop on a man Negan’s size, without a gun.

Carol stood up, hugging herself, “I better check on Atlanta…”

Daryl grabbed her arm as she went by and saw her whole body flinch, he nodded at her, “I know….I know you woman….I know it’s killing you…it’s killing me….but you saved us…did what Andrea couldn’t…”

Carol ripped her arm out of his hand left the room. Standing in the hallway she took deep breaths trying to get herself under control. He knew, how could he not, he knew her better than anyone else had ever known her. She jumped when Atlanta came running out of the bathroom.

The little girl froze for a minute, “Momma, you alright?”

Carol forced a smile and knelt down looking at her daughter, pushing a stray wet curl behind her ear, “I’m fine baby. I have watch tonight so daddy is going to put you to bed.”

Atlanta smiled hugging her mother, “I love you so much mommy. I’m so glad that you and daddy are home safe with me.”  
Carol bit down a sob, pulling away she stared at her daughter, “I love you so much sweetheart. You be really good for daddy and listen to Aunt Kayla for me.”

Atlanta nodded kissing her mother’s cheek. Carol pulled her into a hug and held her for a minute memorizing the feel of her daughter in her arms. Atlanta giggled, “Silly momma, I have to go, daddy is waiting.”

Carol let her go, “Remember momma loves you baby girl.”

Atlanta nodded opening their bedroom door. Carol stood up moving to her rifle she walked into the night. She passed by Dave and Kayla smiling sadly at them as she made her way to the wall. Instead of going to the wall, she turned heading to the small door that led outside. She walked up behind Glenn who was on watch and smiled, “I got this why don’t you go and check on Maggie and Hershel. Take a little break.”

Glenn eyed her, “I’m good. Maggie was just here a few minutes ago.”

Carol nodded, looking around, “You never did do things the easy way.” Glenn turned to ask what she meant when she brought the butt of the rifle down knocking him out. Carol moved him where someone would find him and she stepped out the door, making sure it was secure, she didn’t want anything getting inside at her family. Walking into the dark woods she sobbed, she was too far gone to be near anyone, let alone her daughter, or the man that would forever have her heart. She would go to the place where she could finally find her peace. She would go to her other daughter and beg for forgiveness.


	15. Healing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning...

-D-

Daryl knew she would run, he had seen it building in her and he knew this was the only way heal her. He had pulled Dave and Kip aside that afternoon and told them he was going to confront her about what had happened. Both men weren’t totally sure of the plan but they agreed she was disconnecting again from everyone. So the plan was simple, Daryl would confront her and Kip would wait in the woods for her to make her move following her until Daryl caught up.

Now Kip groaned as the morning sun started to beat down on him. She had made it out of the woods and moved onto one of the highways by morning and he knew she was looking for a vehicle and he knew if she got a vehicle before Daryl got there he would be going it alone. He sighed ducking behind a building when Carol turned around scanning the area, he chuckled, she was good, but not as good as he was. He almost gave himself away when Daryl’s hand clamped down on his shoulder, “FUCK, you scared the hell out of me!”

Daryl chuckled, “How’s she doing?”

Kip sighed, “Cried all night as she walked. I could hear her, broke my fucking heart.”

Daryl nodded; peeking around the corner of the building he saw her getting gas from a car. “She’s siphoning gas; we need to find something to keep up with her. I think there’s a Harley dealership over a few streets, I can swing by there and get us something.”

Kip shook his head, “NO, I like you and all but I can’t be on a bike that long anymore and honestly I’m not riding bitch with you.”

Kip narrowed his eyes on an old minivan, “That’ll work. Quieter.”

Daryl huffed, muttering under his breath, “Bitch.”

Kip smirked, “Yup, but not yours.”

-D-

Carol was exhausted by the time she found the old church. It sat back from the road and she knew that she needed to at least rest, if not sleep. Stepping into the small church she put down two walkers, not even giving them a second look as she made her way to the basement. Finding a room with a high window she could get out of if she had too, she sunk to the floor after barricading the door. She thought about what her life had been like since the world ended. She didn’t understand why she had suffered so much in her life. It seemed that others got their happy ending but she didn’t. Maybe she was made to suffer? She closed her eyes and she saw all the people that she had lost, but in her mind she had broken when she lost her daughter.  
Something breaks in a mother’s heart when they lose their child. Getting into her bag she pulled out an tattered pony tail holder, the elastic was gone, but bringing it to her nose she thought she could still smell her baby there. Closing her eyes she thought about all the moments that nothing would take from her. Holding her daughter for the first time, that sweet face looking up at her, someone to finally love her for herself. She thought of her first steps, how her face had lit up as she walked toward Carol, her little arms out waiting for her mother to catch her. It was all still there inside of her, just like those moments with Atlanta were. 

Atlanta.

Curling up on the floor she sobbed, what was she doing, she had a living child that was waiting for her. What if she got killed out here searching for forgiveness? What good would that do Atlanta? She didn’t know what to do anymore, her mind was a mess.

If she slept she saw rough hands grabbing at her flesh, tearing her apart. Sometimes Ed. Sometimes the wolves, and now Negan. She didn’t want to sleep; she wanted to find the peace that she hadn’t had in so long. She was getting ready to get up and go back when loud moans and scratching at the door started. 

Sitting up she looked out the high window and saw several pairs of walker feet shuffling outside, she had been so lost in her own world she had let a herd box her in. Gasping for air she pushed herself into a corner, tears rolling down her face. This is what she got; leaving another child behind, letting her own need outweigh that of her child. She grabbed for her back pack and pulled out the gun she had tucked there, she wouldn’t make it easy for them. Putting the gun against her temple she trembled, whispering into the room, “I’m sorry baby. I’m sorry, momma is sorry. Forgive me Daryl.”

Just before she could pull the trigger, the door slammed open. Standing there in all his glory, chest heaving was Daryl. Walking toward her he kicked the gun from her hand and pulled her to her feet. She grabbed her bag as he led her out of the church. Kip keeping cover over them from an old minivan as Daryl shoved her into the back seat.

She sobbed into his chest as Kip hit the gas and moved them away from the herd. She didn’t say anything as he held her; she just kept muttering into his chest, “I’m so sorry.”

-D-

Once she had fallen asleep against him, Kip looked back at him, “What now?”

Daryl sighed, “Georgia, like we planned. Only way I know to stop this shit. She never got to heal after Sophia. I hate leavin’ Atlanta like this….”

Kip shook his head, “Negan’s gone man, Dave and Kayla and the others will watch out for Atlanta. We’ll get her there and hopefully this shit will put to rest. She’s been through enough as it is.”

Daryl didn’t say anything he just held her tighter against him, hoping that his plan worked. 

When they stopped that night, Carol didn’t speak and neither did Kip or Daryl. They set up camp and made dinner in silence. Carol seemed to be deep inside herself and that was fine, Daryl wanted her to deal with everything she hadn’t yet. He made her eat and then settled in the back of the minivan with her. She tried to fight him, but he wasn’t letting her go. He pulled her against him and growled at her, “Go the fuck to sleep.”

Carol had just stared at him and he moved so his nose was against hers, “I ain’t done with ya yet. Go ahead and be a bitch, I can fuckin’ take it. But once this trip is over, we’re done with this shit. We go home and we fuckin’ get the happy ending, we get the house, the kid, the dog, whatever the fuck. But for now I’m exhausted and so is Kip so lay the fuck down and go to sleep. I might love your ass but right now I want to kick it. So push me woman.”

Carol opened her mouth to say something, but Kip interrupted her, “tsk, tsk, knock it off Pixie. We love your ass and you’re stuck with us.”

Carol huffed and turned her back on Daryl, leaning against the other door of the minivan. Daryl sighed, sitting in the dark he waited till she was asleep. Once she was, he tied a rope from his wrist to her leg, if she tried to move he’d know. Then he leaned against her, his arms going around her, he kissed her neck softly, “Night woman, I love ya.”

-D-

They hadn’t spoke since they left Kentucky, that was eight days ago and Daryl hoped like hell this would reach her. Pulling up to the farm he felt sick, most of it was gone, the weather had battered the old farm house. He heard Carol gasp behind him and he knew it was shocking to her too, to see the house like that. “Oh God.”

Daryl didn’t say anything he just pulled pass the house and stopped in front of the remnants of the barn. He got out and motioned to Kip, the two men keeping an eye on her inside the minivan, “Stay close, keep us safe, but don’t stop her no matter what, I’ve got her.”

Kip nodded, “Alright man, I sure as fuck hope this works.”

Daryl swallowed hard, walking over he pulled the door open and grabbed Carol dragging her out of the van. Carol’s eyes were wide as he pushed her in the dirt where he figured Sophia would’ve fallen after Rick shot her, “There, you’re here. Right in the spot where she got put down. That what ya want? Ya want to wait for a walker to come along and take you like it took her?”

Carol looked up at him, “Why are you doing this?”

Daryl looked down at her, it was breaking his heart, but he knew she had to feel it. “What? Does it bother your ass? She was out there alone. You didn’t keep an eye on her and she was out there alone and got bit. Then I bet that fever hit her and it about drove her nuts. Can ya see it in your mind?” Bending down he poked at her temple, “CAN YOU? Your little girl turning into that thing we had to put down?”

Carol growled, getting up on her knees, “WHY!”

“Why what? SAY IT!”

Carol sobbed, “Why my baby? Why did you stop me? I could’ve been with her!”

Daryl shook his head, “NO! Then we wouldn’t have Atlanta. Remember her? The baby that we made, the one who survived with you all that shit? The one who is waiting on you at home. You lost Sophia and it hurts woman, but you need to feel it. You never fucking felt it! SHE’S GONE AND IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT!”

Carol shook pushing away from him, but he held firm to her arms, “NO! I DIDN’T WATCH HER!”

Daryl pulled her to him, “She’s dead Carol. Your girl is gone, but you got a family here. One that loves ya. Now feel it woman, feel the loss. Sophia is dead. SAY IT!”

Carol sobbed, “SHE’S DEAD!”

“Who’s dead?”

Daryl felt his own heart breaking, as she screamed out the little girl’s name, “SOPHIA! SHE’S DEAD! MY BABY!”

He held her then, like he had years before in the dirt in the front of what was left of that barn. He held her and knew that something had changed. Carol was feeling the deepest sorrow of her life. It wasn’t what she did with Negan, or what the wolves did to her, or Rick. Her deepest sorrow was losing her first baby, her Sophia. He knew now that she would heal finally, something he couldn’t help her with then, but he could now. She had made him whole and now he would make her whole.

-D-

That night he watched her as she sat at Sophia’s grave and talked quietly to her daughter. Kip walked up behind him and put a hand on his shoulder, “What do you think?”

Daryl sighed, he was tired down to his soul, “I think she can heal now. No matter what the wolves did, no matter what she had to do with Negan, this was the worse. Losing Sophia. I think she’ll take a small part of her old self back with her now. Now she can work on being just Carol. Not filled with all this pain.”

Kip squeezed his shoulder and left him heading back to the fire. Daryl walked closer to Carol, his voice soft, “Baby, we should get some sleep.”

Carol looked up at him and nodded, reaching her hand up he took it and helped her to her feet. When she was standing she looked into his eyes, “I’m sorry…..for everything.”

Daryl took her hands in his, “Woman, do you remember after Merle?”

Carol nodded, it remembered it well. He had come back and locked himself in the far west tower for days. When she finally went to him, he had hit her, trying to take his fury at his brother’s death out on her. She had built him back up, “Yes.”

Daryl smirked, his hands gently caressing hers, “It’s what ya do when ya love someone. That’s what ya said that day and I’m sayin’ it now. I’m just sorry I didn’t see how much pain ya was in before. Maybe we could’ve fixed all this shit sooner.”

Carol sighed, her mind still grieving for her lost daughter, but she wanted to get back to her other daughter, “We leave in the morning?”

Daryl nodded, “Yeah, hopefully be back to Atlanta by week’s end.”

Carol leaned into his chest, closing her eyes, “I’m scared.”

Daryl wrapped his arms around her, “Me too, but that’s why we have each other.


	16. Happy Endings

They never spoke of it.

Not him, not Kip, and certainly not Carol. They never spoke of what happened on the road between Sophia’s Hallow and the old Greene farm; they never spoke of the pain that flowed through Carol as she sobbed that day in the dirt. They never spoke of the moment in the middle of the night when Carol confessed to him what she had done to save them all, the moment that he took to the woods for three days and trails them, leaving food but not coming back. 

They never spoke of the night he did come; he simply sat down next to her and stared into the fire. Kip wanted to hide somewhere but he stayed put hoping that Carol could hold herself together after three days of crying. But she simply put her hand between them with her palm up and he laced his hand in hers and that was the end of it.

So they never spoke of it again. 

They never spoke of how she made them stop a few miles from the compound and how she locked herself into an old office and she screamed and sobbed. Daryl slamming into the door with so much force he dislocated his shoulder to get inside to her. Then Kip watched as the rough looking man held his friend and brought her back from the dark place that was threatening to eat her alive. And when they walked out of that old office building days later she seemed lighter and her fingers laced with Daryl’s as they walked into the gates of Sophia’s Hallow.

When Dave asked him what happened out there, Kip just shook his head and stated, “There’s nothing to talk about.”

-D-

Carol sat on the porch of their home and smiled as she watched her daughter walk toward the center of town with Mitchell Black, the two bumping shoulders and laughing as they made their way toward the Harvest festival that the compound was having. She could already hear the music and smiled to herself when she started to tap her foot along with the music. Glancing back at her daughter she saw that Mitch had grabbed her hand and the two were smiling at each other. Carol knew Daryl wasn’t happy about their sixteen year old daughter dating a boy three years older, but Carol knew it was a good match. She was glad they had built something that allowed her daughter to be able to have love and not the running and fear that had haunted so many children after the turn.

A soft giggle drew her eyes down the other small path and she saw Ella and Carl Grimes walking with their youngest daughter. Carl looked up and waved and Carol waved back. She was glad the young man didn’t hate her for his father’s scarf ice. Carol missed Rick, missed the man he had been when she met him. She sometimes wondered if he would be surprised where the group had ended up.

A year after she had left the compound to have Daryl and Kip come collect her, a fire burnt through their little compound. They decided together to move everyone out West. It was one hell of trip and they lost many on the way, but they settled near the Grand Canyon. Carol was very pleased when they named their new home Grimesville. Her mind would always go to her lost friend and the conversation they had in her old Jeep on the way to farm, they were going to the Grand Canyon and they had made it. Carol kept to herself the fact that she knew Rick saw her in the Wolves’ camp; no one else had to know that, she never asked Rick about it. She had hated him for so long, but she had come to peace with him. She had come to peace with a lot things. 

She knew she wasn’t fixed, she knew she would always be a little broken, or bent like Daryl said. But she was alright with that.  
Snapped from her thoughts she looked up to see Kip and his wife Vicki walking toward her, “You coming Pixie?”

Carol shook her head, “No, I’m waiting for HIM…you know he’s more of a diva then I am.”

Vicki chuckled, “Don’t I know it. We’ll save you three seats.”

Carol nodded watching them walk away. Kip had helped Vicki when she came into the compound, the two were kindred spirits and she was glad he found peace with someone. 

Everyone in their group had done alright; Michonne had fallen for doctor they had found on their way to the Canyon. And now she raised her horde of children on the other side of the compound, Aaron Grimes looking more and more like his brother and father every day. Glenn and Maggie ended up with three little ones of their own, all girls and poor Glenn had his hands full.

Carol felt a tugging at her shirt and she looked up to see her four year old son Merle standing there. “About time!” She scooped the boy up and kissed his cheek, “Where is your daddy?”

Merle snickered, “Daddy’s sayin’ bad words because ya made him clean up.”

Merle wasn’t theirs in blood, but Daryl had found him one day on a run. His mother had been torn to pieces by a walker and Merle was just a few months old locked in a closet. It was his cries that Daryl heard which saved the little boy. When he brought him back and Carol looked into the face of the boy she knew he was a Dixon. Now at four he was every bit the Dixon that his father and sister were. She kissed his cheek, “Well you came out of the shower alright.”

Daryl’s rough voice behind her made her turn and smile, “Yeah well next time I’m just waitin’ to take a shower, this little tad pole got me soaked when I gave him his bath.”

He sat down on the stairs hard and slung his arm over her shoulder, “Where’s our daughter?”

Carol smiled, “I let Mitch walk her….”

Daryl groaned, “Damn it Carol…what’d I say…”

She silenced him with a kiss. He leaned in deepening it and they both heard Merle make a gagging noise, “EWWWW….can we go?? We’re missin’ it!! MOMMA!! DADDA!”

Daryl chuckled giving her one quick kiss, “Come on woman, little man wants to see the band.”

Carol smirked, letting Daryl help her off the stairs of the porch while Merle ran ahead of them. Daryl’s arm went around her shoulder and she snuggled into his side as they walked. Daryl leaned down kissing her softly, “I love ya woman.”

Carol smiled, “Whatever you say, I love you too Pookie.”


End file.
